Missing You

• by Janet Cook
• 1 year ago

Always miss him but sometimes this pain is extra bad. It's been 6 years. Moved. Didn't help. Know he's in heaven. He loved the Lord but sometimes it's (extra) bad for me. This pain. You go on. Your muscles move. Your bones move. You do (most of) your chores but sometimes none at all. You help people but sometimes none at all. Only God knows the pain because He's the one that loaned me my soulmate. Only God knows. He's gone. Can't stand this but you do, you know, only sometimes.

• by Tammy Logsdon
• 2 years ago

My husband passed away three months ago very unexpectedly. We were together for twenty-five years. I still can't believe he is gone. I often go and walk along the beach and think of him. I have had pictures developed of him and hang them just so I can look at him. Don't know how I am supposed to live without him. My heart is shattered.

• by Jeff
• 2 years ago

I lost my partner, Luke, the night of Jan 26, 2022. I knew from the moment he introduced himself on our first date, that this was the man I was going to marry. He stole my heart. He showed me how to be a better person, father, partner and lover. When we were together, we were always physically touching each other. It could have been simply a hand on the knee in the car, holding hands in a movie, or holding each other in bed at night.

I miss you so much. I'm so heartbroken. I miss you crawling back into bed in the middle of the night and whispering how much you love me and how we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. I miss how you would sing to me at night. You melted my heart. Until we see each other again. Sweet dreams Babe. Love you.

• by Reena Perumal
• 2 years ago

I lost my 50-year-old husband. He was hit by a drunken driver while cycling. He had to have emergency brain surgery and wasn't responding for almost a week. He passed away on 17 October 2021. I miss him so much, and I cannot come to terms with his death.

• by Karen
• 3 years ago

My beloved husband, Paul, who I cry daily to be with, passed away March 25, 2021. I lost my home, which we shared together in 21 years and had to liquidate everything I owned for medical expenses and other obligations and still have debts of $20,000, but all of the material things mean nothing when you lose your soulmate.

We have a 33-year-old son and he is everything to me. Paul adored Michael and looked at our son as the "apple of his eye." Michael molded a handprint statute of their hands together and crying tonight with Michael on the phone and said, "I still can't believe your father is gone." I remember holding Paul's hand till he took his last breath.

I know he was taken up the Heaven by an Angel. I had 40 wonderful years with Paul. All I know is one day we will reunite in Heaven. Blessed be the Lord.

• by Ellie
• 3 years ago

I lost my husband last month. He was only 47. He was my whole world. I loved him since I was in high school and in love with him since we got married 15 years ago and we had happy wonderful life. In March 2021 we had been told he has secondary stage 4 bone cancer which we were not told about the primary cancer. It was so sudden, and he was gone in 5 weeks. I am depressed, in shock, and do not want to believe that my love has gone, and it's getting worse and worse. I do not think I am strong enough to accept this and live without him.

• by Mary Armstrong
• 3 years ago

While in the hospital he fell. This in turn made him unable to walk without help. September came and went, so did October. His health was worse as the days came and went. Now it's November and Thanksgiving was closing in. My husband was to be coming home the day after Thanksgiving. Well with Covid 19 lurking about, I decided to bring my husband home sooner. Tuesday was the day I brought him home. He was different! He was dying before my eyes. He was alert yet odd. He was not my husband - very weak, frail, his emotional state was very bad. He was kind spoken. Thanksgiving dinner was at around 4 p.m. We gathered at our daughter's home. Had dinner, he ate so good - we were shocked. We watched a movie and he talked with our daughter. Then at around 7:30 p.m. he was ready to go home. Our Grandsons helped. He stayed in his wheelchair a hour or less then wanted to go to bed. My 2 grandsons helped him stand and walk him through our mobile home to the bedroom. He walked just to the door and died.

• by Catherine
• 4 years ago

Today is our 36th wedding anniversary. This is the third anniversary that he has been absent. I still don't feel single, and I feel like he is at my side. His words echo in my mind, and I feel like his wisdom resonates in my heart. We were fortunate to have found each other, and I know that I was the love of his life. That is one of my big achievements. Thoughts of us give me comfort looking back in retrospect. I can recant and recall the past, our story survived in me.

• by Ashley Barrera
• 4 years ago

I lost my husband almost a year ago to the date, June 23, 2019. We were together for 13 years, married 3. We experienced all of the for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health before we even got married as he lived with end stage renal failure prior to us getting married. As the 23rd creeps closer, I feel myself not being able to be as strong as everyone has seen me be. I've told my story hundreds of times of the night that we lost him, but the images keep flooding my mind of that night. It just seems like it is not real. I know the grieving process is different for everyone, but I did not think this part would come back so strongly. As I read this poem over and over, it made me cry but also made me smile. These have been almost my exact words when talking about the loss of my husband. I know God has his reasons as to why our time was so short together. I also know that he would want nothing more than for me to be happy because that's how he lived his life every day.

• by Diane Carter
• 5 years ago

It's been such a long time. Tonight I am missing him. It never goes away. The pain and loneliness just get easier to carry. I was 36 with a 7-year-old. I am quiet and not easy to know. He cared enough to try hard. He talked to me carefully, knowing I was broken. I did not want to love him - but I did. I begin to feel as if God gave me this wonderful man to me in reparation of my painful life. A gift so I would know love. I begin to feel safe. Trusted him to not leave me or hurt or carelessly shove me aside. Then one day he was gone. Now I'm shattered and wondering if God was laughing at me. I hope not. I've lived. Raised my daughter, raised other children who needed me. Tried to honor him and his trust in who he thought I was. Now I am nearly 60. I still miss him and still wish it could've been me. Someday I will see him again, but I have spent my life alone. I loved deeply, wondrously, and passionately. And was loved in return.

• by Lindie
• 5 years ago

My husband died 17 years ago in a car accident when I was only 29 years old. He left me with a daughter who is 24 years old now. We were together for 11 years before he died. I am still grieving. I miss him a lot. I seem strong, but deep inside l am bleeding. I am a born again Christian, but l am in pain. I always wish that God would heal my pain. I also wish that others may not experience this.

• by Ursula
• 5 years ago

My condolences to you and your family. I know it doesn't get any easier as time goes by because I lost my husband 9 years ago from complication from a surgery he had and to come to find out he had cancer. He was in the hospital for two months and passed away at 39. Here I am with our son at the age of 12 when his father passed away and not understanding how this can happen. As a single mom, I tell you and every widow out there to be strong and have faith. I always speak to my Boo Boo and know he's there listening to me. When you find your soulmate and think you will be together forever, it just feels like a nightmare. They will always be in our memories and in our hearts, but always talk your child about the memories of your late husband. I never had a support group to speak to anyone about losing my husband and what I've been through, but I feel like this helps. My prayers to everyone, and again, be strong and remember the great memories.

• by Paula L Reid
• 5 years ago

I laid my head upon my husband's chest while they turned off his life support. His heartbeat ran fast then slow and stopped. My dear husband worked as an engineer for 52 years until he turned 70. l told him when he was 64 to stop working. I'm sure he thought he would live to 100. We decided to sell our house to travel. He lifted a concrete slab to the septics and tore his aorta all the way down. He was rushed to hospital and had two operations. He survived but died a year and half later as it opened up again, but before his last operation he gave me a letter to tell me how much he loved me and our children. He must have known he wasn't coming back. This was three years ago and still feels like yesterday. He was a talented singer too and a very loving and caring husband and father for 39 years. l struggle mentally with my grief, and l only live so not to hurt my children any more than they already are.

• by Kelley Goodrich
• 5 years ago

I lost the love of my life, my soulmate, my best friend, lover, protector, caretaker and father to our two beautiful amazing daughters on February 5, 2019. I suffer from MS and Epilepsy, and we spent the last 9 years together 24 hours a day and still laughed and carried on as if we had just started dating!! I am completely lost without him, but knowing I will be reunited with him when God calls me home to be with him for eternity gives me some solace. My heart aches for him every day, and I am so tired of hearing it gets better with time! Who came up with that saying? I wonder if they lost their soulmate! Nothing will make it better. We laid down to take a nap, and when I woke he had passed. I have comfort that he woke to use the bathroom and woke me to tell me he loved me and give me our usual 2 kisses! Our 16-year-old sleeps with me every night because she doesn't want me to be alone and says her daddy would want her to be with me. We lost him at the tender age 47 due to a heart attack.

• by Christina Green
• 5 years ago

I lost my husband of 13 years suddenly on March 15, 2019. He was very active. Just went to his doctor. Everything was fine. We were happy. He was my soulmate, my best friend! Now it's silent. We had a good, solid marriage. He was only 48. We have two children. I'm so heartbroken and devastated. I came home and found him peacefully asleep, forever.

• by Jamie Lorance
• 5 years ago

I lost my husband of almost 25 years on 2/12/19. He had a birth defect of the heart and suffered through several strokes, brain swelling, cardiac arrests and then fungus took a hole of his heart and ate the top part of his heart. He had a total of 3 open hearts surgeries with 2 of them being 3 months apart. He never pulled through. We have a 21 year old daughter. A few days before he passed away, he smiled at us and that was when he had his last stroke and went into a vegetative state. My daughter and I were with him when he took his last breath. I was with him since I was 18 years old. People have told me that I am strong. I don't feel strong. I cry almost every day. I tell him every day that I love him and I miss him. I wear his wedding ring on a chain. I miss him so much. There are days that I feel i can do this, but then there are days where I feel like I don't want to. I have never been on my own and now I'm forced to.

• by Suzanne
• 5 years ago

My Husband died on November 27, 2018, in our house. He got up to go to work, as always. I woke up, realizing he didn't come kiss me goodbye. He was sitting in his chair and I knew it was bad. I did CPR until the rescue arrived, screaming his name, begging him not to leave me, but we never got him back. I go over that morning every day in my mind, thinking maybe he called me and I didn't hear him. Maybe if I had gone downstairs sooner. You see, he was widowed when we met and I was divorced. We were over the moon happy to get to find love again. We had a beautiful wedding. We were so happy. He was the love of my life. Four months married and he was ripped away from me. My heart is just broken, and I'll never get over this. He was my best friend, my sweetheart, my everything. It feels like someone came along and just gutted me. I'm just an empty shell without him. I go on, but I'm screaming inside. There are no words to explain the loneliness. I'm empty.

• by Judy Farr
• 5 years ago

I miss my love of 42 years so much. It's been almost nine months since his passing. We were only 17 & 18 respectively when we married. I miss his love for me, his children, church and community. I miss everything about him. He made me a better woman. I know he would want me to not get stuck in grief, but I constantly see him vividly on the day he suffered cardiac arrest in the dialysis center with no one helping him. I can't seem to move past why this happened to such a beautiful soul. I'll always love him til my last breath.

• by Marirw
• 5 years ago

My fiance passed just 3 weeks ago. In a month we found out he had stage 4 bladder and bone cancer. We were together 20 years. Never once did he complain about pain. He was gone so soon. He took his last breath right in front of me at the hospital. He fainted and that was it. I never left him one night while he was there. I stayed right by his side. My head is so messed up from all of this. I'm lost, angry, depressed, scared, you name it. It doesn't help that today's my birthday. I feel I will never get over this.

• by Geraldine Brown
• 5 years ago

My heart breaks for you. You will go on - as days and nights still continue to come and go. I still go to bereavement counselling with palliative services every fortnight. I need to talk about my husband with someone who listens without judgement of how much I miss him. Palliative care have been amazing. Don't put a time limit on grief. It is nearing 11 months and it feels like yesterday that the nightmare began. The up and down wave of grief hits me every day. I'm not sure that it will ever go away, but I cope with distractions. I control what happens every day of the week so that I am not alone because the loneliness without my husband breaks me. I wish I had answers for you, but the reality is everyone is broken from the loss, and like my counselor said - you will never be the same person, but you will never lose the connection to your loved one either. You carry them with you in everything you do and everywhere you go. I hope you find some peace through counseling.

• by Ika
• 5 years ago

My husband passed away 4 months ago on his way back from business trip. He collapsed at the airport and they took him to a nearby hospital. In that time, my daughter and I were waiting for him outside the immigration, but he never come out. No one informed us of what happen to him until we found it from our family phone tracker. We rushed to the hospital, but when we arrived at the hospital doctor said there is no sign of life. Doctor said he passed away because of a heart attack. It was a shock for me. No chance to say goodbye. I love Him so much. He was gone with half of my soul. I'm really not sure if this pain can heal. He was a very good father and loving Husband. I will missing him forever.

• by Seipati
• 5 years ago

On September 1, I lost my husband and 12-year-old son in a terrible car accident. We were married 15 years, and he was 38 years old. I am left with 2 kids, 15 and 9. Life has turned upside down for us. Each day is a struggle. I have no words to express the emptiness I feel.

• by Gary Boyce
• 6 years ago

I lost my wonderful wife, best friend, lover, and support system on August 9 to lung cancer that had gone to her brain. She was diagnosed only 2 days before our 2nd daughter’s wedding (she missed) in June. We were in shock. No signs other than a bad back for months. She had 10 radiation treatments and only 1 chemo because after the first chemo treatment she came home and collapsed, so we had to bring her back to the cancer institute. It was horrible when they canceled any further treatments as my wife thought they quit on her. But they did not. So she came home for 3 weeks of home hospice for which we did 24/7 as she never would sleep but maybe 2 hours a day. They put her into the hospice facility where she lasted 8 days until I was with her when she took her last breath. I hate what life I have left with NO future as we planned. I am lost and only want to be with her now.

• by Judy Nelson
• 6 years ago

My husband had a sore throat and upset stomach. He had a GI doctor, and they just kept giving him different stomach meds to try. They thought it was just acid reflux. He lost his voice. Then I'd had enough of seeing him suffer. His GI doctor gave him orders for a gallbladder ultrasound. It came back normal, but he had chest pains and then they decided to send him to ER. They did a CT of the chest and found stage 4 lung cancer. This date was March 22, 2018. I've seen my husband suffer the worst. He lost the battle and he's now resting with the Lord. He passed away September 28, 2018. I can't explain the sorrow I feel. We have two children. He didn't smoke but worked with chemicals and not a very good work environment. They did wear any masks.

• by Penny Barnes
• 6 years ago

I lost the one true love of my life November 18, 2016. It's been almost 2 years and things have not changed much for me. My husband died after surgery, when that didn't have to be the outcome. He was my entire world. He took care of me as I have chronic pain due to a back injury. I don't have many friends and I don't work. I find as the years go on my loneliness increases. I wish I could've changed places with him or that God would take my life as well. Our daughter was pregnant with our first grandchild and my husband died 2 1/2 months before he was born. He was so excited to be a grandfather, that every time I leave my now grandkids, I cry because I know what he is missing and it breaks my heart. We were married 21 years. I am so sorry for all our losses!

• by Deedee
• 6 years ago

My husband died five years ago at age 58. He had leukemia, and in spite of horrendous induction chemo, he went in less than 2 months. We were married 28 years and had 2 children. He was my world and my friend. Our marriage had a lot of problems at the end, so I did not expect to be irrevocably and deeply affected by his death. Fool me. We thought we had all the time in the world to work out our problems. I have remarried happily, but I miss him every day and talk to him. He doesn't answer, just like when he was alive! I cannot believe the agony and sadness of losing a spouse. I am changed. I miss him so much.

• by Frank
• 6 years ago

My wife died 12 years ago. I was at work, and my son called me to tell my wife passed out. I rushed home, but they went to the hospital; she was in a coma for three days then died. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss her. I am lost and sad and walk around in a daze most of the time. I wanted to retire to travel with her, but now I have nothing but work to keep me going. It is a sad and lonely way to live, but I don't know what else to do.

• by Paula
• 6 years ago

My husband of 26 years had small cell lung cancer, and with chemo he lasted 9 months. He was 47. The devastation I felt is indescribable - a black hole I just couldn't see my way out of. Our 3 adult children, all in their 20s, had no idea how to help me as they were grieving too, so it was agreed I would go to counseling to help me through this horrible time. In hindsight, I should have made my kids come too as now 3 years later they struggle with bouts of sadness. But counseling was the BEST thing they could have suggested. I LET GO OF MY PAIN and let it consume me so deep so that I could start to heal. I took my wedding rings off and got them checked and cleaned and gave them to our kids as I didn't need them anymore as he was going to be with me in spirit for the rest of my life. Some days I still get wet eyes for no reason, but life does really go on. I have met a wonderful man to love and adore all of us, including 4 grandkids, and in 14 days we are getting married.

• by Carol Burke
• 6 years ago

My husband of 43 years died in April 2018. He had a heart attack in our driveway. I stumbled across this site, and I really love the messages people share about their loss. Thank you. I function and get through the day, but I am sad to the bones. I know God is near, and I continually pray to feel his presence to get me through step by step. I don't think you ever stop missing a loved one.

• by Lisa Wolfe
• 6 years ago

My first husband and I were married 26 years and had 3 sons together. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in February 2006. He passed away July 1, 2006. I had to keep living for our sons, but inside part of me died with my husband. About 7 months later I met Barry. He had lost his wife around the same time I lost my husband. They had a son and 2 daughters. He was so easy to talk to because we were going through the same thing. We began dating and married in October 2007. Our families became one. Our children became brothers and sisters. We kept our spouses' memories alive and celebrated everything with their families also. While on our family vacation at the beach on July 9 Barry got out of the ocean and made it to our chairs. He then collapsed. They said it was a massive heart attack. We were married 10 years. Nothing can prepare you for the heartache of losing someone you love. Not even going through it before prepared me for it. I am lost without him.

• by Natalie
• 6 years ago

My husband and I were riding our bikes to Best Buy when he died. He was just starting his vacation for a week. We did everything together. Best friend for 30 years and married for the last 16. My dad died unexpectedly May 3; then Rod 5 weeks later. He somehow passed out then fell off his bike right in front of me. I go over the whole scene in my head a lot. If we weren't on our bikes we would ride the bus or light rail. I now ride our routes alone, and I can't focus on anything because any memory will bring tears streaming down my face, so I turn around and go home.

• by Kim Page
• 6 years ago

My husband died 3 months ago, April 24, 2018, after a terrible struggle with ALS for 8 years. He also had a stroke in 2016, which impaired his left side beyond what ALS had done so far. We were together for almost 40 years, married 35. Three of our daughters and I cared for him 24/7. I can't describe in a short space, if ever, all that he bravely endured and what we all endured with him, for him. How painful it was to slowly lose him day by day for years. Holding onto hope every step. Being aware that ALS would take him did not help us prepare for the immense loss we feel. I can't put into words how much he meant to me and our children and how much we miss him. My words can't begin to summarize him or his life. He loved and cherished us; we loved and cherished him and still do. I feel as if my heart will never stop hurting till I can see and be with him again. I want to honor him every minute of every day. My heart aches so, but I have hope in knowing he is alive in heaven, waiting to see us again.

• by Angela Williams
• 6 years ago

My husband passed away on June 5, 2018, from extensive non-small cell lung cancer. He was 62 and I am about to be 50 in 3 weeks. I am lost. I can't stay in my house because it is so empty without him. I cared for him for 5 months. He was diagnosed on January 16th and we buried him on June 16th. I was touched by each poem and story.

• by Linda J Vaught
• 6 years ago

My precious husband died March 20, 2018. He had a bypass surgery - it went fine. He was recuperating. He also had "restless leg syndrome," but the hospital said it was federal law that they could not leave all bed rails up. My husband fell out of bed when I wasn't there to watch him. He broke all stitches open. After that there was one infection after another. Subsequently, he died from severe infections. I lost him and myself. I pray for God to take me so I can be with him. I have to wait on God's will, but my life is empty until I can be with him. He was not particularly religious but led an honest, righteous, LOVING life. If I could change this law that could help just 1 person, it would be worth it.

• by Kelly Masur
• 6 years ago

I lost my amazing, loving husband, John, on January 26, 2018. He was told when he was 48 he had liver cancer. He did well the next 3 years. Many trips to Iowa City to see the liver doctor. Then one day he was feeling sick and tired easy. November of 2017 we traveled the 73 miles to see the doctor. The doctors went on to explain this was the beginning of the end for John. My heart was crushed! The doctor said about 5 months. So we come home and tried to live as normally as possible. In December John became confused and disoriented. He began asking me who I am. We got him to the hospital and the ammonia in his brain was almost 3x the normal. I was sure this was the end. However, John got better. He was my John again. He knew who I was and that the mortgage needed paid. He's able to come home after 8 days. The doctor told me he was going to dive again and he would not recover. He did. 16 days later my love was gone. I miss him more every day. He is my John...my precious John! I still need him!

• by Geraldine Brown
• 6 years ago

I lost my husband on May 6, 2018. Today I fare-welled him in a beautiful service. It was so hard to listen to everyone saying that it will get easier and that I am very strong, when all I want to do is be with him. I know exactly what each person is saying and feeling in their response to this poem. My grief is so raw. We have been together for 34 years, and he was my best friend and protector. He loved me unconditionally, and I feel lost without his presence and love. He was my one and only. He was diagnosed in February 2017 and told in January 2018 that all avenues of treatment had been exhausted. He was so disappointed but remained strong. He told me to speak at our children's weddings on his behalf and discussed with the girls who he had organized to walk them down the aisle when the time comes. My head tells me that I must carry on to fulfill his wishes, but my broken heart tells me I don't want to be here without him.

• by Kimberly Rogers
• 6 years ago

I had to say goodbye to my Jerry on January 14, 2018. I was told that he most likely died from a blood clot. He had 2 stents put in the Wednesday before and said he felt great from Thursday to Saturday. I found him gone in his sleep Sunday. I was hurt and devastated. What has helped me has been faith and prayer. I believe I will see him again one day. Until then I’ll love him every day and remember the moments we shared. Blessings to all.

• by Joan Duckett
• 6 years ago

Hello everybody. I lost my husband, soulmate, and best friend nearly three years ago very suddenly. He always appeared to be a fit man, but one night he collapsed into my arms and he died early the next morning. He had a stroke and a massive bleed on his brain. I miss him all the time and cry a lot. People say time heals, but I found I feel worse. Miss him putting his arms around me when we went to sleep. I hope he is with my beloved son who we lost to suicide thirteen years ago. I feel I have nothing left and wish I could join them. ~Joan

• by Sharon Merrick-Hall
• 6 years ago

I tragically lost the love of my life to a massive heart attack. He passed away in my arms in our home, exactly where he wanted to pass. That gives me a tiny bit of comfort that his very last breath went into my body exactly in our home. Advice? Kiss more, hold each other longer, and don't sweat the small stuff, for none of us are promised tomorrow.

• by Jay Roach
• 6 years ago

I lost my wife of over 62 years. I still feel alone sometimes. She was 84, passing away just before Christmas 2014. We met in high school. We married in 1952. We had 4 living children. Even now after over 3 years, I still suffer from losing her. She was truly the center of the family. I think of her every day. She passed just 12 days before she was to meet our great grandson for the first time. She was so looking forward to that. She was into family history research and was able to go back to 19 generations. She had so many activities and friends. I cannot count them all. She grew from childhood, losing a lower leg from a farm accident, cancer tumor on vertebrae, paralyzed for over 2 years, cancer of the breast, 25 blood transfusions. She never complained. She was always upbeat. Our children miss her so much. They say she is in a better place. That provides some solace, but I am lonely and sad sometimes and just keep going. I'm waiting to see her again.

• by John Ridriguez
• 6 years ago

I met my wife to be 47 years ago. We fell in love and were married. We planned and raised 3 boys. Married and parenting life was as normal as life comes. We were a family that did everything together. Life was good. We prospered and moved out of our house after 30 years of making memories for country living. We were making new memories. My wife retired at age 55. I had 11 years to go until age 66. With one year until retirement, on June 18, 2015, my wife was diagnosed with ALS. We were devastated. She was so healthy all her life. Our world crumbled. I took an early retirement as my wife needed me more than anything. I became her full time caregiver. I love her so much. She passed away December 23, 2017, two days after her birthday and two days before Christmas. That's the way it was meant to be. The end of life was expected, but the pain seems worse now that she is gone. Life's different, and now my support is scarce, life's empty, and I'm alone. It hurts. There are reminders everywhere. Life will never be the same.

• by Delores Salinas
• 6 years ago

Your words are exactly my feeling right now. I can't help but get emotional. My husband passed on November 12, 2017, and your words are my life right now. I'm sorry for your loss.

• by Cheryl Christina Pareti
• 6 years ago

My husband died February 19, 2017. He had a stroke in the night. He had gotten up to sit in his recliner, and I was still sleeping. When I got up, I saw him there, unable to talk. He was only able to move a finger on his left hand. I felt helpless, horrified, and devastated! We had been married 50 years and together 56 years--since we were 15 years old. We had lost our first son 49 years before. He was my rock, and I depended on him as he did me! He lingered 11 days on life support. Then that horrible day came when I had to take him off of life support! My remaining son and I just stood there and cried. We were devastated and still grieve his loss every day! He was a wonderful husband and father. I'll never be able to cope with this loss. I look forward to joining him one day! He would have been 72 years old in August of this year. We were very close, and I still can't believe I'll never see his sweet smile, hold his hand, or enjoy his since of humor! I'm not well, and my son cares for the best he can!

• by Shelly Clemmons
• 6 years ago

I lost my reason to live on June 12, 2017 and just flat out do not want to go on without him. Everyone says it gets better with time, but that's a lie... it does not ever go away. I have lost two children in my lifetime as well. The first was way back in 1982, and yet I still feel that pain and loss as acutely as if it just happened an hour ago! I do not want a replacement mate...I want my best friend and soul mate back here beside me. I love you, Donald "Duck" Lee Collins, and that fact will forever remain. I will be yours infinity times infinity just as we always said...until my ashes mix with yours and we are joined again! I miss you so much!

• by Thu Betteridge
• 7 years ago

My husband died on the 27th of December 2015 of Mesothelioma. He came into the hospital for a diagnostic procedure and died 3 weeks later. He never made it home. I am still in great grief. I am afraid I can never love anyone again. He was my world and he is still my world.

• by Gayle
• 7 years ago

My sweetie died September 4, 2017. He had Esophageal Cancer. He was told he had this on Sept 13, 2016. He didn't make it a year. He was my world, my everything, my best friend, my lover, my soulmate. I miss him so much. The last year we were together every day. Now my life feels done. I miss him so much. He should still be sitting in his recline. Resting, watching the news. We were supposed to grow old together. I am so lost without him. I really believe a piece of my heart went with him. Love and miss you, Kevin. Forever.

• by Terrie Biggs
• 7 years ago

Tomorrow will be only two months, but it feels like a lifetime, forever. I miss my husband: his hugs, his laughter, his fussing, his silliness. I cry and don't even realize I am. His daughters have made this transition very hard, and I am thankful for my children. We were together 21 years. And while I know God will get my through this, my heart still breaks when people only want to say time will heal, when I really just need someone to let me cry.

• by Doreen Barr
• 7 years ago

I lost my husband on Aug 09, 2017. He lost a long battle with Alzheimer's and several strokes. My whole being aches; I am consumed with thoughts of our life. My family is here now but soon will return to their own homes. I dread being alone. I'm trying to be the great pretender so others think all is okay. It has been a long journey and at times had wished his memory and my husband would return and if this was not possible end the journey with Alzheimer's disease.

• by Yarrum
• 7 years ago

My best friend, who was my husband, died 4 weeks ago and was buried 2 weeks ago. I told him to go and I'd be ok. I'm strong as I've not been alone mainly because my family wants to make sure I'm ok. I'm not ok - but it's normal - normal to feel empty, sad, alone in a crowd, angry, guilty, abandoned, loved, left, different, impatient and no idea who you are or what you like as a single person. We met when I was 22. He was taken by a cancer when I turned 50. We grew up together and now I have to start out on my own with no desire to be anyone other than his wife. He made me whole, and for that I am forever grateful. Words can't express how much he is missed, not only from my life but from others, too. It's the hardest ordeal I have ever faced. I'm also afraid...very, very scared...financially and emotionally...I keep seeing rainbows and hearts...not sure why, but I love him and miss him so much it hurts.

• by Jan Heath
• 7 years ago

My husband died 17 years ago today. We had been married 18 years and our son was turning 2 in August. Life was perfect. Then the cancer came and took my best friend. There are many ways to be sad. You decide the best way for yourself...no one else. There are no time tables for how long you are supposed to grieve. Only you can figure that out...no one else. Lots of people, lots of advice, lots of choices, but in the end whatever you do will be the right thing for that time. I can honestly say that things do get better. It takes time. I still cry some days and I miss him. But it's a different kind of sad now.

• by Sophie Douangaphay
• 7 years ago

I too lost my fiancé on 4/13/2017, so suddenly and tragically. Although we do not have any mutual child together, we had unconditional love for one another. He loved my kids like they were his own. He loved them before he even met them. He was so perfect for me. I've never met anyone like him before. We were supposed to say our I do's on 10/30/2017. I still have our marriage certificate application stamped by the County of Sonoma waiting for us to turn it in when we got officiated. Before I met him I thought I wasn't having any more kids, so I had my tubes tide. We made plans to go on vacation, and after our vacation we would go straight to our surgeon to get my tubes untied. We were supposed to go away for the weekend a couple of days after he passed. My world came crashing down. I'm a 40 year old mother of three kids, ages 21, 17, and 10. My life just came crashing down. What am I supposed to do now?

• by Elizabeth Hiebendahl
• 7 years ago

I lost my husband of 36 years on February 18, 2017. We were in Florida to attend our daughter's wedding. He went to sleep that night and never woke up. It was his heart. He wasn't feeling well before we went to Florida and I said, "Do you think we should go." he replied, "I need to." No more arguments we went and there he died. I think he knew. He was where he loved and with all the people he loved.
He is still with me. Now I have a spiritual relationship with him. I feel him everywhere. Thank you to all my sisters in this agony of pain for your sharing. Believe it or not, reading those letters, I didn't feel so alone. Close your eyes and remember his loving look he gave you or remember his little kisses and you will feel him.
Until I am united with him once more, I will go on with my life as best as I can. God Bless All of You!

• by Ang Amy
• 7 years ago

Tomorrow would be the 2nd month that my husband passed away, 19 days after being diagnosed with liver cancer. Oh why, why, why, I keep asking. Where are you? I miss you so much! Never a day my eyes are dry, every day after work, I dread going back to an empty house, but once home, I can cry for all I care. I do not have to pretend that I am fine, that I am strong. Suicidal thoughts come and go, but my religion tells me that it's not right, that I won't meet up with him should I die this way. Oh hell, where and how can I move on?

• by Delia Harma
• 7 years ago

I lost my husband of 43 years to aortic stenosis. He was my rock, my everything. He was only 65 and healthy. It was routine for him to walk me to my car so I could go to work. That morning he told me he was going to visit his dad at the hospital as his dad's health is deteriorating. While he was signing in to see him, he collapsed and died. I feel so lost. I don't even know if I am coming or going. I cry constantly, and the pain is like someone just turned my stomach inside out and ripped my heart out. I lost my husband in the morning of March 20, 2017.

• by Lorna Zinck Gordon
• 7 years ago

My husband Ken and I were out for a drive on March 21, 2017. He pulled off the shoulder of the highway to secure a metal crate on the back of our pickup. I turned my head and bang...I'm in the woods looking around trying to get myseat belt off. Got out, ran to back of the truck. To my immediate right 40 feet away, my husband laid face down not moving his legs crushed...he died instantly. I didn't want to leave the scene...and when I came home I had to tell my 3 older kids from my 1st husband whom died in a tree accident 6 years prior and our 9 year old son he will never see his dad again. To think people say to us it happened for a reason. Get out of here. How the hell can you say that? We were happy, we were a complete family who overcame struggles from our pasts, cancer scares, alcohol and more, yet this happens. I'm so angry, so alone and will never forget seeing my Ken, laying there and not able to save him. My heart aches every second of every day and struggle in fear to move forward.

• by Irene Withers
• 7 years ago

We were married April 29, 2016. He passed March 12, 2017. I'm still trying to make since of this. I woke up to him saying he was in pain, he passes out, we get to the hospital. He jokes with everyone, and after I feel all is well again, I leave to go to the restroom, only to come back to that soul shattering news. I just can't comprehend what happened. It was a heart aneurysm. He was 27...I am 24. This spoke to me so much because the reason I married him was partly because of how safe I felt around him. No one else ever gave me that. I actually felt safe in my own skin with him. I just don't know. What just happened? He made me a better me, he was the most amazing person. His eyes, oh his eyes, I don't know how to do this without him. The only thing keeping me steady is the thought of what would he want me to do. It feels like someone ripped out my soul, shredded it and mixed it back in wrong.

• by LaRissa Jones
• 7 years ago

I married my husband on 2/1/17 and lost him on 2/27/17. He went to the hospital to have a hernia removed. He caught e-coli and died in my arms. I'm so heartbroken. I don't think I'll ever get over this, but I do know that this too shall pass.

• by Danette Ritter
• 7 years ago

I lost my husband on February 1st, 2017. He had a massive heart attack. I met him when I was 16, and I am now 58. I have never lived on my own. I cry every day. We would have been married 39 years this June. We had so many plans. My daughter is getting married this year, and now she will have to do it without her father. I wish I was with him. I miss him so bad.

• by Patricia Garcia
• 7 years ago

Hi, my husband passed 02/13/2017, and since then my life will never be the same. I have lost husband, friend, and lover. It feels like yesterday. I can't believe it. We just became grandparents. We have 1 daughter, 29; we have 2 sons, 25 and 30, and a grandbaby born on12/18/2016. We were married 34 years. I miss holding his hand at night and talking to him and watching TV. I miss fixing his lunch. I miss him so dearly. He left for work on Monday at 5am, said goodbye and he loved me, and he would see me later, but I never did. He had a stroke at work and a brain aneurism and he passed at the hospital. He was 53. My world is upside down now. I'm on SSI and disability, and he had no life insurance, so it's gonna be hard to move on moneywise. Also, I'm so scared. I don't know what's ahead for me. I hope some of this pain goes away in the next few months. God, I miss him so much, miss his voice, want to talk to him so bad, want him to walk in the door one more time. My heart is in so much pain.

• by Leslie Woody
• 7 years ago

I lost my husband of 25 years on Feb. 18, 2017. He was 43 years old. We have 3 children (2 boys: 22, 20 and daughter: 17) and a 3 year old grandson. I'm not really sure how to feel or act. Sometimes I just cry, and sometimes I want scream. He passed in his sleep. It's so hard looking at my children, and seeing him makes me feel good. My grandson has my husband's eyes bluish grey beautiful. I'm trying to deal with this minute by minute and second by second. It's so hard. We had no life insurance. I had 2 days to come up with $2,000 before they even started his services. Made me feel mad, angry but sad and empty. The Lord provides. Thank you for letting me share a little bit on the loss of my best friend, my rock, and my love.
Leslie Woody

• by Jo Marlar
• 7 years ago

My husband went home nearly 3 weeks ago. He had battled different health issues since 2008. We were married 40 years back in October. More than half my life. I am lost and feel as if my brain is in a fog. I know I still have a long way to go. Many adjustments ahead. I haven't worked in over 6 years so I could take care of him. I do have a great support team, but it just doesn't seem right.

• by Trish Reid
• 7 years ago

Paul died 6 weeks ago. We knew it was going to happen. His bladder cancer had metastasized after 6 months of chemo and immunotherapy. But it happened quicker than anyone could have guessed; hospice hadn't finished their paperwork. He could only sit reclined on the couch anymore, so I was sitting next to him while he slept. My head was on the pillow next to his at home when he took his last, quiet breath. I'm devastated. Even that doesn't sound strong or terrible enough to describe how I feel. The photo of the woman with her hand on her husband's pillow, at the beginning of this page, looks like me every night and morning. I, too, can't understand that he won't be coming to bed or coming home, ever again. It all just seems unbelievable that I'll never see him again. I can only cry when no one is around; why is that? Or on the phone sometimes, then I can't stop. I wanted to go with him and sometimes still do, just to see him and touch him again. I will love and miss you forever, Paul.

• by Katie Belcher
• 7 years ago

I'm 17, going on 18 in January. I've been with my boyfriend since I was 10 years old. Young kids, and we grew this far. He passed away at 22 years old on November 07, 2016. I guess I came here to seek help in some way or just to talk to others who've been through the same thing. I feel like I'm suffocating slowly without him. Every day feels like another heartbreak. I'm lost without him here...

• by Sandra Masungo
• 8 years ago

I lost my husband on the 24th of October last year after ten years of trying to have a baby. I was left without a husband or a child. I AM SO EMPTY INSIDE. To lose someone I loved brings pain beyond belief. Every day I wish I could tell him how much I need him and miss him.

• by Hava. Salimi
• 8 years ago

I lost my husband last October 23rd. I had been taking care of him more than 10 years. He had dementia and Alzheimer's. We had a very hard time, but I was happy with him. He was enjoying the life. I do still feel truly empty, lost, and I can't stop my tears in the public or with my friends. Sunday will be the first anniversary with him gone and his birthday too! In the morning I will be in Mont Rose cemetery for his first anniversary in heaven. I invited some friends in restaurants for dinner to celebrating his birthday too.
Thanks for your poem!
Hava.

• by Olivia Pitts Gonzalez
• 8 years ago

July 22, 2016, my birthday, I lost the love of my life, Edwin Gonzalez. It has been 2 months, and the pain is unbearable. My faith in God and loving family and friends are faithful in their support, and I am grateful, but nothing at this time removes or lessens my grief. Sometimes I feel like people don't get it...I want to scream and say, "I just lost my best friend, my lover, my life. NO, I AM NOT OKAY." I know he wouldn't want me to be crying and so lost, so I try each day to be strong, remembering all that we did, our laughs, holding onto all the memories we created....thank you for this platform...it's 11:51pm eastern time, and as usual, I can't sleep because he is always on my mind.

• by Carol
• 8 years ago

My husband, the absolute love of my life passed away 5 months and 2 days ago. We met when I just turned 18 and were married for 35 years. If this can be an inspiration to all of you who feel the devastating pain as I do, I feel that he is not gone. When people tell me "I'm sorry for your loss", he is not lost.
Each day I am certain he is with me . .. love is eternal.
A few days before his passing, he burst into tears in his hospital bed and said "I can't lose you". I held his hand and said "Let's make a pact right here right now that I will never lose you and you will never lose me".
He is in the rays of light each day, he hears me talk to him, he checks on me . ... .. a love that deep and strong can never be gone.
This carries me forward every day until our souls are reunited in heaven and we are returned to each other for all of eternity.
Bless all of you. I feel your pain. I know the despair.
For he is not gone . .. .. he is forever in your heart. Much love and strength to you all.

• by Cheryl, Paisley
• 9 years ago

Thank you for the poem! It is exactly how I feel! I lost my Husband in a tragic vehicle accident 5 years ago leaving me with a then 12, 10 & 8 years olds. People think I have moved on but I am not sure I ever will! I go to work, make sure I am there for our children & try to survive against all odds! Yes I am still angry at the senseless act of some one else, that caused the life to be taken from my husband & father! I am lucky if I can sleep for 5 hours a night, since that day 5 years ago! But I carry on! One foot in front of the other & try to smile!

• by Mahmuda
• 9 years ago

My husband was killed in a tragic car accident, 11th December 2006, I was left with 4 young children and a lifetime of sorrow. He would be so proud of our children, they are kind, loving, helpful and just plain wonderful. I tell them all the time that daddy loves them and is keeping an eye on them from heaven. BUT I can't get over the emptiness or the loneliness I feel without him by my side. When does this pain go away? He was too young to go so soon, it was never a supposed to be this way. We were supposed to grow old together, watch our children grow into adulthood, marry and have children of their own. We miss you every second of every day.

• by Robin
• 10 years ago

I lost my husband to murder. He came to my aid when I phoned him as a result of a minor fender bender in our townhome development. He just walked around the corner to assist me and heard someone hurling slurs at me. He was shot to death right in front of me. The killer has to this day not been arrested, but I am coming up on a grand jury hearing where my prayers of an indictment will be answered. I feel so much guilt; but isn't a wife supposed to call their husband when in need? It was my first instinct as he was only 1 minute away in walking distance from our home. I feel a number of different emotions, sadness and sorrow to anger and despair. I miss him dearly and deeply. Words can not express the roller coaster of emotions I deal with every day, every hour and every minute. He was my rock, my best friend. I just keep praying for justice and then maybe I can see the light of continuing life without him. My smile is masked and the days are long and dreary. When will the sun shine for me and the light of the sun on my back feel exhilarating once more. Can one really make lemonade out of the lemon of losing a husband? His absence will never be quenched. This lemonade stand is closed.

• by Crystal, VA
• 10 years ago

I lost my fiancé January 4,2014. We were together for 14 years since I was 15. I'm now 29 with a 9 year old son (who looks just like his dad) and a 7 year old daughter. He was my son's best friend who was diagnosed with autism at the age of 5, and my daughters hero!!!! I'll never forget hearing those dreadful words and then having to come and take everything in me to explain to my babies they'll never see their father again!!! The pain I still feel everyday. I often imagine him walking through the door again and throwing our little girl in the air (as she had him wrapped around her little finger) and talking to our son about anything. My chest is so hollow and my heart skips beats daily!!! I strive for our babies but its so hard facing reality everyday. I don't think I'll ever love anybody like I loved him!!! But I do try to keep my head to God and have faith that he will see us through!!! I love you my beautiful Angel and I CANNOT wait to see that beautiful smile again!!!!

• by Barbara, Louisiana
• 10 years ago

I lost my husband, Emmett and son, James 1/24/12. They were in a car accident together. The date of their death is bittersweet as it was the anniversary of our first date. We were married for 34 years. We also have a daughter who still lives with me and I am so thankful for her. We have gone through the many stages of grief together. It is hard to put on a brave face all of the time but she understands me. People that I called my friends don't call, they don't know what to say. I wonder how my heart can keep beating and be broken so bad. The pain never goes away it just becomes more bearable with time. I miss them so much. Thanks everyone for listening.

• by Yustine, Batam Indonesia
• 10 years ago

Today is the 1st anniversary of my husband's death. I try to smile and put on a "happy" face for the world. Mostly for my 2 precious daughters.
I am sad, depressed, angry, regret, devastated, miserable. The emptiness I feel consumes me and as the days go by it gets harder and harder to go on. As most of you have said no one, absolutely no one understands the pain I or any of us feel
The nights are just the hardest...his face kept haunting me...kept coming to my dream...I keep hearing a friend said that life still goes on, yeah it's easy for them to say it because they don't know how painful and regret I feel. I still miss him more than ever. Thank you for giving us life and sharing your smile. We remember you always. Pray for you always....RIP.

• by Evelyn, Surrey BECAUSE
• 10 years ago

My Husband passed away December 19, I cry every night and most days. May 19 will mark the 5 month mark of his death and it is also our secondary anniversary, even though we were only married 2 years we were together for almost 25 yrs. I feel so guilty because he said he would die within the year he would die, I didn't take him seriously and we had 1 anniversary and never again will we share another one. I miss him terribly. Some days I just don't think I can make it another day. People expect me to be happy and I try to put on a mask but the moment I am alone the mask comes off and cry and talk to him. Will the pain ever go away. Will I ever stop feeling guilty for being alive while he isn't. I find myself looking for him everywhere I go and in everything I do, but he isn't there and it hurts so much. Will I ever stop wanting him to be with me?| I just don't know how I will survive without him.

• by Sharon Benskin, Camberley
• 10 years ago

Hi I lost my darling husband on 5 November 2013. Who is sadly missed. It's not a day that goes past that I do not think of him. He's been in my life since I was 17 and were married for 32 years on the day I will never forget 2 May will be our 33rd wedding anniversary and when that day comes I do not know what I'm going to do.

• by Sandy, Cincy
• 10 years ago

It's been almost 6 months since I lost my husband of 32 years. We had 3 children together and now have 5 grandchildren. He died suddenly at the age of 53. I had just left for work and my son found him putting on his socks early that morning. I wish I was the one to have found him so my son could have been spared such pain. My children are the strong ones. I am just so lost without him. And I am also tired of people telling me stop crying. My family has been great, but again since none of them has ever been through it. It's hard for them to understand.
Great poem!!!

• by Betty Hendrickson
• 10 years ago

It has been 1 year tomorrow since I lost my husband Cordy to cancer. He was diagnosed in January with lung and brain cancer. He had a very short battle. It was 48 days from the day he was diagnosed until his death. Our 30 year marriage was a wonderful one. We had a business together that we worked at every day together. I feel so much pressure from others to move on. For me, it's one day at a time and that seems so overwhelming. Most days I feel like I just want to be with him as it is next to impossible to push myself to move on. I wish there was an answer for me. Being a young girl of 19 years old when I met my husband, it's the only life I know and miss beyond belief. It's going to be a long haul. It's so hard to keep your faith. I pray every day I will get through this.

• by Sandy Hogue, Palm Springs California
• 10 years ago

I lost my husband just 2 days ago. It was sudden and I was woken up from him trying to catch his breath. I began CPR, I could not get him to wake up. Paramedics arrived and they took over to try to save him. My husband was unresponsive when they got him at the Hospital, Doctors came out to tell me that he passed away. I hurt beyond hurt, my heart is so heavy. I feel like I cannot go on, A part of me has died. I cry all the time, nights are worse for me. Waking up to an empty house and knowing that I am alone. Having to live without my husband who I adored, cherished and loved so much, I hurt beyond hurt. I love him so much and cannot believe he is gone. Just knowing I have to live my life without him scares me, I will cherish the kind of love we had for one another forever.

• by Kathy, North Dakota
• 10 years ago

My husband Robert the love of my life passed away 3 days after our 34th Anniversary after a fall left him bleedIG in his brain. We fell in love at first sight. He was the most loving compassionate man I had ever met. We had one child. And now have 3 grandchildren. Which I love with all my heart. My husband passed away in 2011 and I am trying my best to do what everybody expects of me. But there are days that I feel so lost and alone. Everybody's answer to this is start dating. That will never happen, I am so in love with my husband and don't ever want that to change. The silence is deafening. I just don't know how or when this gets better. I love him and miss him every minute of every day.

• by Alicia
• 10 years ago

I just lost my husband on the 5th. All of your words are exactly how I feel. I feel lost, broken, sad, mad, confused, alone, guilty, weak, like I have no control. I can't fix this. I feel like I was given this huge book and when I picked it, it was full of stories, but now half through the rest of the pages are blank. Our love was written... where did it go? I know we had amazing times and each day if I am lucky I will remember new ones. I will love him forever more than I can explain. It's hard because he was just so amazing and he loved me unconditionally. I didnt have the best childhood and I was bruised before I met him, but he just accepted me, through everything. He taught me what LOVE and LOYALTY really is. I could not have spent the last seven years with anyone better. And even if at times, I didn't get it, he spent the last seven years where he wanted. He is gone so young but he felt what most people chase and look for their entire lives. He's the lucky one. I love you Jason!

• by Kim Jollye
• 10 years ago

I lost my wonderful husband, Brian, on November 22, 2013. We were together 27 years. He was the absolute love of my life, my best friend - my life. Some days I don't want to go on. I pray for GOD to take my life. We never were able to have children. I am so alone. I do have family that is trying to help but as we know the pain is too much to bear. I will never get over my loss and I look forward to the day I am reunited with him in heaven. I say this saying and this is how I feel. "You were the heart of my life and the life of my heart".

• by Sharon Wilson, Brooksville
• 10 years ago

I understand, too well. After I lost my husband on 1/19/2003, I heard the "move on" speech from almost all our "friends". When I didn't, because you can't, one by one they drifted away. Now I only have his Sister to remember him with and even she imposes limits. Grief has no timeframe and will go on as long as it wants. I feel that the more you loved and were loved in return, the worse the grief. I know my Stephen was my everything. He allowed me to grow, encouraged me and loved me no matter what. He was the only man who ever told me I was beautiful and daily told me I was, "cute times 10!". How would someone "get over" love anyway?

• by Janice Bloom, Pocatello
• 10 years ago

My husband of 41 years died the evening of our 41st wedding anniversary. I am sad and full of tears. He suffered with cancer and it finally beat him. He fought hard to stay with us. I really miss him. He is the love of my life. I thank God for him and our love...

Best Wishes to all and peace to all,

• by Sharon Pacatang Lim
• 10 years ago

I lost my husband 4 months and 10 days now to be exact. I terribly missed him, super missed. We've been together 3 years and 8 months as boyfriend-girlfriend and two days before were supposed to celebrate our 1st year wedding anniversary he left. That was the most painful part of my life. Until now, I'm grieving. Sometimes I feel I'm Okay but no, I'm still in pain. I pray to GOD that he will get me very soon so that I can be reunited with my husband again. People keep on telling me to move on and yes honestly slowly I'm trying to move on but I can feel the emptiness within myself now, living a life without him.

• by Sue Dennis, Australia
• 11 years ago

I lost my husband 6 years ago on the 31.8.2007. I still feel the pain and the heartache. They say as time goes by it gets easy will I am still waiting for that time. We were married for 34 years. He was not just my husband but best friend too. He was taken from me with an illness that they knew little about. I love and miss you Mike.

• by Amanda, Florida
• 11 years ago

My husband passed away almost 3 months ago at the age of 26, because people on the road do not know how to drive. We have no little ones so I'm left alone, fighting alone. This poem is exactly how I feel!!! Thank you

• by Shannon, Michigan
• 11 years ago

My Husband died suddenly in the night of our 25th anniversary. I tried to save him to no avail, An aortic aneurysm took his life within minutes. He was 49. The pain is so intense that I can only let it out in dribbles...throughout the day. By nightfall it takes me over. My fears, remembering the night, reaching for him. I don't know how to live, I was 16 when we became inseparable. He was always there, unchanging, my rock. Our families rock. I am going on hour by hour again. Day by day is just not working. Its been 27 days and feels like yesterday. I miss him so much, Can't fall asleep, night are the worst. Thank you for the poem. I thought I'd better get on a site that understands. I know my friends are tired of seeing my sadness on Facebook.

• by Deb Tucker
• 11 years ago

Tom is gone from my life. He was most of my life, so now I am just this empty shell. This Enormous emptiness engulfs what is my new normal life. How does one move on from something like this? Time, just only passes by. I am trying to fill my time with what has to be done, but I fell like I am just passing time. Empty, that's my life now, can't talk about him just thinking about him hurts and bring the pain and tears. It's only been 60 days since his life and most of mine ended. In a strange way I am glad he died before me because I would never want to put him through this kind of Hell.

• by Gloria Noble, Falls City
• 11 years ago

My dear husband had never been sick yet the last 17 days of his life was in a hospital. I certainly didn't know what to do, the nurse's came in and gave him some Morphine. He took 1 good breath and another then one tear, another breath and he was gone. No more do I get to hold his hand, hear his laughter, and hear that beautiful heart. He went home on March 17th I only thought I'd been thru it all NOT. I even doubt if I was a good enough wife hadn't I taken good enough care. I cry day and night some places I can't even go it was our place. I LOVED HIM SO MUCH & HE IS MISSED

• by Julie
• 11 years ago

My precious husband passed away August 10th, 2012. He left such an imprint in the lives of so many people, especially mine. We were so synchronously in tune for 46 years, I have felt at times as though my balance is thrown away. I have found that as I seek the Lord for His purpose for the remainder of my journey in this life, just giving and sharing memories of his good qualities, healing began in my heart. Oh how we loved celebrating life together, enjoying one another's company, finding beauty in each other and things we treasured together. Now I see a hint of new purpose unfolding as a flower petal captured on a camera lens, each day a hint more revealed. I hear the Lord whisper, "I have a purpose for you My child." And life is no longer standing still but purpose is unfolding. Thank You Lord for working all things in my life according to Your purpose (Rom.8:28).

• by Pretoria South Africa
• 11 years ago

I lost my John on 18 December 2008. We were married for 28 years and have two wonderful children. I miss him everyday and I still have his ashes in my home as I cannot part with them yet. I have not closed that chapter of life yet.

He was my friend, lover, confidant, teacher. I learnt so much from him as we got married when I was only 18 and he 22. He was a wise man and had so much to give. A third party took him away from me, one I could not fight and it consumed him and claimed his life. But through all his tribulations with this evil demon he stayed a wonderful father and husband.

Darling you were ripped from our lives so suddenly before we had the chance to say goodbye or sorry for everything. You are now in a better place. We miss you so much. R.I.P. John

• by Marilyn, Littleton
• 11 years ago

My wonderful husband died one month and two days ago. I feel as if I'm wandering through a landscape made of thick, sticky mud. I keep telling myself to just breathe and put one foot in front of the other. I have so much guilt because I didn't see how ill he was and he wasn't telling me because he didn't want to upset me. That's who he was - he always thought of my first. He is such a lovely, caring, patient, giving and tender person. Our life together was still so full of promise and dreams of things to come. I feel my life is over. I want nothing more but to be with him. I'm so sad and feel so alone. I can't get through a day without crying my eyes out. Everyone says - give it time - I don't want time - I want him. I just want to be with him but I'm too afraid to kill myself because I'm afraid I'll go to hell and never be able to be with him again. I can't bear this pain, but I will if someone can promise me that he will be there waiting when my time comes.

• by Michelle, White Swan
• 11 years ago

My husband, Johnny passed on November 2007. We spent 26 years together and we had 6 kids. We loved each other from first sight, and still to the end. Even now I love him still. I watched him get sicker and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do was to let him go. I didn't want to but cried and gave him permission to go. I felt guilty like I murdered the man who loved me. He told me he was ready and he knew the way, that's when I told him it's ok now you can go. I couldn't control my sadness. I am better than I used to be. My life hard with out him. Our children needed him, I needed him, all we have is each other. Life was wonderful and safe with him. I am blessed, thankful to have had him for so long. He was our center, our life evolved around him. We all miss him so much. Memories is what is left. I Love You Johnny, our family is big and beautiful with 9 grand children. Thank you for giving us life and sharing your smile. We remember you always.

• by Erika, Salisbury Mills Ny
• 11 years ago

Hello everyone, My name is Erika And I lost My Elliot, the love of my life on August 17th 2012 at 2:55 pm it was a Friday 4 days away from what would have been our 9th wedding anniversary. It has been 5 months and 14 days since I have seen his beautiful face, but yet it feels like yesterday that I saw his beautiful face. Elliot was my Husband, Lover, Friend, my person in every sense of the word. The emptiness I feel consumes me and as the days go by it gets harder and harder to go on. As most of you have said no one, absolutely no one understands the pain I or any of us feel. Melanoma took my Elliot away from me and I am angry at the world. Thank you for allowing me to share

• by Audra
• 11 years ago

My husband James passed Jan. 6 he was my life I don't know what to do. We would have celebrated are 20 year wedding day Jan. 25. It's so hard trying to maintain and figure out what to do day by day...

• by Lat, CA
• 11 years ago

Jan 2nd will mark the 2nd year anniversary of the death of my beloved husband. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him & imagine what life could be if he was still here. People don't know the feeling of losing a husband until it actually happens to them. Thanks for sharing your story & I will keep you all in my thoughts & prayers.

• by Valerie
• 11 years ago

Exactly how so many feel!
After a 15 month battle with melanoma, God called my husband home on December 19, 2012. We were together for 22 years. We spent most of our time together just talking about anything or nothing at all. We went almost every place together. We were never apart for more than a few days the entire 22 years. It's so hard trying to wrap my brain around him not being here. All our friends said we had a 'forever love'. Forever together heart and soul.

• by Lynn, Canada
• 11 years ago

I read all of these and feel like other people understand how I feel. My husband died almost a year ago and my boys are only teenagers. I feel like I am competing sometimes with my mother in law as her failure to move forward at all for my boys means she hurts so much more. I have to pretend to be happy every day, pretend to be 'normal' whatever that is anymore. I have lost my life....my future and my love. I cry alone, at night because no one wants to hear I am not doing ok.....thank you for sharing ladies, it is comforting knowing I am not alone.

• by Linda
• 11 years ago

I am coming up on a 5 year mark when I lost my husband. Sad to say but it still hurts like it did the first few months. I have been to groups and counseling but nothing eases the pain and loneliness. Family was great in the beginning but now it seems to bother them. I still wear my wedding ring and I am living on but I just don't fit in anywhere anymore. Widow is a lonely harsh title that I never wanted. Thank you for the poem and it is comforting to know we are not alone in this world. Take care

• by Kathy, KY
• 11 years ago

I lost my husband April 25,2012 because of complications I believe from a male nurse trying to insert a pic line. Before two days were up my darling was gone. I really have no desire to go on. I really don't want to live without my baby. We have three grown children, and a 17 year old who will soon graduate high school. Yes the nights are hardest, sometimes you cannot sleep without some kind of help. My life and our children's lives changed forever on that day. On Christmas this year, he will be gone eight months. Yes you count every minute, every second, hour, day and week. Does life go on? Not for me, you see true love never dies, I truly love my darling and he truly loved me. So until I see him again, and I sincerely know I will, because he was a good Christian man, I will drag on. Life doesn't mean a lot anymore, Everyday he brought a smile to my face and my heart, and he brought joy to my soul, But Praise be to God, I do have the hope we will be re-united forever one sweet day, Gods blessings to you all.

• by Betty Guevara, Pomona
• 11 years ago

I lost my husband 15 days, 8 hours and 8 mins ago we just burying him yesterday. This poem hits home that I miss him the most at night cause in the daytime our kids are with me and grandchildren keep me busy, but at night no one is here. I miss him so much you see he was the love of my life and a great father and the best papa that ever lived it would have been 35 years on March 31 and now I have nothing but memory to comfort me at night.

• by Gwen Jackson, Jackson
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband 8 months ago, and this is how I feel. The nights are long, the days are short, and I keep praying and hoping it will get better. I try to go on for our kids, but sometimes it seems like they're the strongest. Everyone says it will get better but, until you've lost the love of your life, your bestfriend, your husband and soulmate... you will never understand my pain or what I'm going through. He will always be in my heart. Nobody could take his place because he was a one of a kind.

• by Pam Williams, Springfield
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband 2 1/2 years ago, He was such important part of my life, my friend, lover, father to our children and a brother and son. He did so much for all of us, He was always helping people. Working around the house, God took him to soon, I was not prepared for him to go, I will never forget that day, He had just found out 1 month before he passed that he was going to be a grandpa, She arrived 3 days after his birthday, People keep telling me to move on and get over it, but I can't, I feel like the walls are coming down on me, its so quiet in the house, no one to talk to, no one visits anymore, I feel very alone, it is hard, I miss him so much

• by Pat, Racine
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband 28 weeks ago on his birthday. He went to work and never came home. I never even got to give him his birthday card. But for whatever reason we had his birthday dinner the night before. I look back at some weird things that happened and we said. On his way out the door that day he said, give me a extra hug and kiss for my birthday. The minute I received the call at work from his work I just knew in my heart that I would never see him again. Our 25th Anniversary is coming up soon and I don't know how I will get through it. So during the day I try to be strong but when I get home I miss him so much. He was my best friend, lover and husband. am trying to be strong and move on but it is hard.

• by Jacquelinep. Taquilid Philippines
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband 5 months ago, I am lost without him. He did everything for me. He took care of me when I needed things, he took care of me when I was ill, then it was my turn to do in return for him.
I miss him a lot, more than anyone knows. Every day is hard for me. It will take a long time before anything will come about. I will keep my husband always in my heart. I get up every day and think it is going to get better, sometimes it does and then it doesn't, unless you are with your friends or family. Some say you will get over it, well if you haven't lost a loved one close to you, you will never get over it. D ko alam kailan ako mkaka move on

• by Danielle, Texas
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband five months ago. He was killed one house down in my neighbor's yard on March 13th of this year trying to prevent an argument between two of our neighbors from escalating into gunfire and was shot from behind. He was 33 years old and would have been 34 in April. We have two children that at the time, were 11 and 1. Our youngest a girl turned 2, eight days after he was killed. Our son just turned 12, exactly five months from his death on the 13th of this month. It would have been our 13th anniversary on Sept 9th. He was my best friend and my one and only true love. I am 33 years old and have buried two daughters (one in 2004 and one in 2007) and now a husband. They are buried across from each other. Life moves on and basically drags you with it leaving you still trying to compute the harsh reality. When I read this poem I could really relate and am very sorry that you and your son have to go through this as well. God bless and keep you both on this journey.

• by Cinthya, Florida
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband six months ago on a day like today and this this is exactly how I feel. The nights are just the hardest, it feels like it gets worse everyday my family doesn't understand why I cry no one seems to understand all I keep hearing is that life goes on , yeah it's easy for them to say it because they doesn't know how painful and lonely you feel. I still miss him more than ever

• by Cheryl, Chicago
• 12 years ago

Dear Kathy,
I lost my husband 602 days ago. Yes, I count, days, weeks, months. People tell me I should get "over it". They just don't understand. I try to smile & put on a "happy" face for the world. Mostly for my four children.
I am sad, depressed, angry, devastated, miserable, lonely - sometimes I don't leave my house for days. I'm not "over it" and doubt I will ever be.
{{{hugs}}} to you and your son. Thank you for this wonderful poem. It's says everything in my heart .....and more!! XO

• by Kandace Carson, Ont Canada
• 12 years ago

The anniversary of my husbands death will be 10 years June 23rd and it still feels the same. I don't think you do ever get over it!
HE would be thirty and I am still angry!,

• by Ruthann, Toledo Ohio
• 12 years ago

I too lost my husband 4 months ago, I am lost without him. He did everything for me. He took care of me when I needed things, he took care of me when I was ill, then it was my turn to do in return for him.
I miss him a lot, more than anyone knows. Every day is hard for me. It will take a long time before anything will come about. I will keep my husband always in my heart. I get up every day and think it is going to get better, sometimes it does and then it doesn't, unless you are with your friends or family. some say you will get over it, well if you haven't lost a loved one close to you, you will never get over it.
Ruthann, Ohio

• by Mindy, Chicago
• 12 years ago

I lost my husband almost 7 months ago, and this is exactly how I feel. The nights are just the hardest. I keep hoping they will get easier, but they don't. The loneliness and emptiness are just overwhelming. My son is 13 and the only reason I have to get up every day. My friends and family try to be helpful, but they just don't understand. I feel so lost and alone.