Jacqueline Grieve

If I had reached out my hand,
Would you have taken it that day?
Could I have made you feel better?
Could I have made you okay?
Could I have pulled you away
From the dark into light?
Brought you right back to a safe place
And just held you tight?

Why didn't you shout louder?
Why couldn't we hear?
You were all alone that morning,
All alone in your fear.
I know we could have saved you
If we had just seen
You stuck in that pain and torment.
How long had it been?

Your burden you carried
In an invisible case.
You suffered in silence
With a smile on your face.
So many questions we have.
So many words unspoken.
Why didn't we know
That your life was so broken?

I miss you each day.
I try to understand your choice.
If I close my eyes, try hard,
I can still hear your voice.
I know you are free now,
Free to fly high.
I imagine I see you
When I look up to the sky.

I can't turn the clock back.
I can't change time,
But oh how I wish I could,
Sweet brother of mine.
I know you are still with us,
Watching, keeping us safe,
And one day we'll meet again
In a heavenly place.

Hey, you guys, don't feel guilty,
It was just my time to go.
I can see you're all feeling sad,
I can see the tears still flow.

My life's journey ended early,
The path I chose was short.
You all tried your best to change it,
But in the end it was for me to sort.

I know I caused you sadness,
I know I caused you pain,
But I was captured by these demons,
They wouldn't set me free again.

They took away my freedom,
They took away my choice,
And when they got their hooks in,
You could hear it in my voice.

There were times I tried to fight them,
There was a time I nearly won,
But they came back and overpowered me,
I had nowhere left to run.

I haven't really left you guys,
I am closer than you know,
I will be the whisper in the wind,
I will be everywhere you go.

One day you will all forgive me
One day you will understand
And when your time on earth is done
I will be waiting to take your hand.