I should have held you longer,
I should have held you tighter.
When you were a baby, I rocked you to sleep
and put you down because there was work to be done,
but
I should have held you longer,
I should have held you tighter
because I can't hold you anymore.
Then you were a toddler;
you wanted to squirm and run,
so I put you down because you wanted to go have fun;
but
I should have held you longer,
I should have held you tighter
because I can't hold you anymore.
You grew and became a little boy,
and the times I could hold you became less and less
but still so dear.
I should have held you longer,
I should have held you tighter
because I can't hold you anymore.
You grew to be a young man.
I wanted to hold you near
but you just wanted to run clear.
But
I should have held you longer,
I should have held you tighter;
I had no idea I wasn't going to hold you anymore.
Now I hold you longer, tighter in my heart for all eternity,
wishing and wanting more...until I hold you again.
To Daniel Vincent Mahan Love, Mom
January 7, 1997--January 3, 2019
Mother Longing To Hold Her Lost Child Again
I lost both my sons in 2020. Joshua was 30 and died from gunshot in his head April 2nd. They called it a suicide. It was not. His older brother Chris, 33, died in June. He hung himself. Chris...
Until I Hold You Again
Published by Family Friend Poems December 2021 with permission of the Author.
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My goodness, I lost my son to an overdose on January 18, 2020, and there is speculation it could have been suicide. He had been clean for 10 years. Shoulda, coulda, woulda. He was my sweet baby and it still hurts.