Grieving For A Loved One

I shed a tear, I feel quite numb
another loss, thoughts of a dearly beloved one.
They say time heals, give it a while,
remember all the happy times and smiles,
and for a while it's true, I smile and laugh,
enjoy my life, forget about the past.
But reality shows its ugly face, bringing back all the pain.
You've really only blocked it out, nothing much has been gained.

You surround yourself with photos and little treasured items
in an attempt to keep them close, raw withheld emotions,
but still they seem so far away.
Nothing really brings them back.
Feeling so alone, I pray,
let me off this one way track.
I would prefer to join them than to go through all this again.
It makes you wonder who'll be next?
These feelings make you cold and drained.

Though you hope that they are well,
not one person can really tell,
but what brings a little piece of mind
is all the others they've left behind.
Remember that we're all the same.
All our lives have changed
even though in different ways.
We've got one common bond.
Each one of us has loved and lost
this special person left and gone.
Here we are, all brought together,
parents, siblings, friends, and lovers.
It's time to say our last goodbyes
as they make their way up to the skies.

For some that might be it
over and complete,
but not for me, oh no.
This still goes on, this sorry show,
the memories still live on.
"It gets easier" ... but they're wrong.
All it takes is just one thought
for these feelings to surface, still so fraught.

Some say they understand,
been there, seen it, all first hand,
but how could they possibly feel what I do?
For they never even knew you
because you were one in a million,
one of those shining stars.
That's why I feel so troubled
with deep and wounded scars.

Each time I lose a loved one,
a part of me dies too.
They each take a piece of my heart
when that time comes for us to part.
I wonder if that's when my time will come,
when there's nothing left to take,
with the fading of the sun, no reason to stay awake.