Changing Places

• by Lennie Dela Rosa
• 2 years ago

Memories! I was 53, he 54 when the complications of Alzheimer's took him. At his prime as an exporter, his secretary fell for him. I left and visited Canada for 3 months, but on my return, friends told me that he should consult a doctor. He was diagnosed with ALZ at age 44. I saw him slowly degenerate. I got a job, and he was left with only a companion. Since he was strong and could partially manage himself, he would wait until I left before he would leave too. Sometimes he would get lost. As a precaution, I gave him a tag with our phone number. Once he was found 100 kms from where we lived. At another, 200 kms away. He was dirty and hungry. During all this time, I was angry and resentful because of his affair; I couldn't forgive. My redemption came when one day I came home early and found him eagerly waiting for me. I decided to give him a bath, and as I was drying him, he whispered, "Thank You." Those two words changed my heart.

• by Birgitta Blickman
• 5 years ago

For the first time in my life I came face to face with the struggle of Dementia. My mother was quiet about the reality of her daily life caring for the man she married over 60 years ago. She was so devoted to this man, my father, she refused to ask for help, until the night he fell and fractured his hip. I found my Mom exhausted when I arrived but anxious to move him to his new home and away from the therapy center. Mom hated that place. I didn't recognize the sad, still, old man in his wheelchair facing a wall. All alone facing a wall! Mom gently pulled my arm and I saw him. I said "Hi Dad!" expecting to hear the chuckle I have heard for years. He looked at me but only wanted to see my Mom. There was fear and searching for the one person he seemed to know. She came to him and held his hand. I followed her lead and held his other hand. Then he saw me and called out my name. I was so grateful for the brief moment of clarity. That night I wept. Three weeks later he passed.

• by RandomPoet
• 6 years ago

My mother had Alzheimer's and spent the last 4 years of her life in a clinic. My father was able to see her almost every day. For several years after her passing, my father, my kids, and I went on a "Memory Walk" in her honor. (I think they have since changed the name of that walk.) It is such a sad ending when someone you love doesn't exactly "die" so much as "fade away" gradually. This poem is very well done.

• by Alice
• 8 years ago

This poems covers so many terminal situations and what we go through, but no poem will show what the victim goes through. The pain, fear, hopelessness they must be going through. On the other hand also bravery, love, compassion for us caring for them. I cry every time I remember my daughter's ordeal.

• by Ruth Feinstein
• 8 years ago

I was very touched by the poem, "Changing Places," since it very simply and clearly mirrors my current situation. My wonderful husband of 63 years is struggling with dementia, caused by a neurological illness. I see him failing every day. Bless the author of this poem by putting it all into words.

• by Kat, Chicago
• 9 years ago

I have met people with memory loss and I have spent time with them and with their caregivers/families at a respite care center where I have been volunteering and where I have shared the novel that I'm writing. Your poem aptly captures the frustrations and challenges and sense of loss I imagine people must be feeling when they see the changes that Alzheimer's brings about and yet I see these family members and caregivers soldiering on, under such difficult, trying circumstances. Bless them all for their patience and loving kindness. I enjoy visiting there, because we always have laughs and fun and it is wonderful to see everyone's smiles and to join in with their laughter. I consider the time I spend there to be a celebration of life.