Poems by Angiemarie1988

Just because I have never done drugs, doesn't mean I'm not cool.
Just because I am a virgin, doesn't make me lame.
Just because I'm not a fighter, doesn't mean I'm weak.
Just because I am not a party girl, doesn't mean I can't hang.
Just because I get good grades, doesn't mean I'm a nerd.
Just because teachers like me, doesn't mean I am a teacher's pet.
Just because I am not a rebel, doesn't mean I'm scared.
Just because I am quiet, doesn't mean I don't speak up for what I believe in.
Just because I have morals, doesn't make me a goody two shoes.
Just because I walk away from trouble, doesn't make me a pushover.
Just because I think before I act, doesn't make me a loser.

I am who I am, and this is who I shall forever be.
I do not care what others think of me.
Like me or not, that is your choice.
Accept me for who I am.

Tell me how to love someone
who doesn't love me back.

Tell me how to respect someone
who doesn't deserve my respect.

Tell me how to trust someone
who betrayed me so badly.

Tell me how to care for someone
who never cared about me.

Tell me how to speak nicely to someone
who only spoke down to me with bad words.

Tell me how to get along with someone
who brought me nothing but endless tears.

Tell me how to get close to someone
who caused me so much pain.

Tell me how to forgive someone
who hurt me so severely.

Tell me how to open my heart to someone
who broke it to pieces too many times.

Outside lives a girl with a smile that will brighten up the room,
yet inside hides a girl with a frown full of despair.

Outside lives a girl with eyes of joy that bring you to ease,
yet inside hides a girl shedding tears of sadness.

Outside lives a girl with a beautiful laugh that's contagious,
yet inside hides a girl screaming her lungs out in unwanted anger.

Outside lives a girl with the personality everyone envies,
yet inside hides a girl full of insecurities and shame.

Outside lives a girl who is fearless and tough,
yet inside hides a weak girl who lives in fear.

Outside lives a girl full of life,
yet inside hides a girl full of pain, wanting to die.

Outside lives a girl with a perfect image,
yet inside hides a girl with regrets and mistakes.

Outside lives a girl of innocence,
yet inside hides a girl with tremendous guilt.

Outside lives a girl with goals and aspirations,
yet inside lives a girl lost in confusion.

What you see on the outside is my personal disguise.
What hides underneath, you can't even begin to imagine.

I'm sitting here in my room, looking at your picture,
wondering why you couldn't be a part of my future.
Uncontrollable tears stream down my face,
while my heartbeat starts to race.
Asking God why he took you from my life,
it was more painful than stabbing me in the heart with a knife.
I still needed you here.
You were the one to make everything so clear.
You are a part of me, and I am a part of you.
When you died, a part of me died too.
I never knew how hard it was to lose someone you love
until the day you went to heaven above.
Even though I can't see,
I know you're up there watching over me.
I miss you more and more every day,
and all I can do is pray.
In my heart you shall forever remain.

When I was sad and depressed,
I needed you to be cheer me up.
Instead, I drank till I was numb enough not to feel anything.

When everyone was attacking me and putting me down, making me feel so low,
I needed you to be the one to defend me and be on my side.
Instead, I endured all the cruel words and criticism the world threw at me.

When I lost all my friends and had no one,
I needed you to be that only friend I had left.
Instead, I experienced what the word "friendless" really meant.

When I was scared and frightened,
I needed you to be my security blanket.
Instead, I had to live in fear.

When I was angry and full of rage,
I needed you to calm me down.
Instead, I kept it all bottled up inside.

When I felt so lonely and needed someone to care,
I needed you to hold me tight and never let me go.
Instead, I grew up alone with no one to turn to.

When I was hurt and in pain,
I needed you to come running with you healing ways.
Instead, I remained scarred and bruised.

When I would inflict self-torture, wanting to die,
I needed you to stop me and tell me how important I was.
Instead, I hid my scars and became oblivious to everyone.

When I would cry myself to sleep at night,
I needed you to wipe the tears away.
Instead, I held my pillow tight while never-ending tears streamed down my face.

When my world was crashing down on me,
I needed you to be the one I ran to.
Instead, I locked myself in my room in complete despair.

When I felt unloved,
I needed you to tell me how much you loved me.
Instead, I learned the words "I love you" are meaningless.