Sickness Poem

Visiting A Dear Friend In A Dementia Care Home

I watched a very dear friend and companion slide slowly into the grip of dementia over several years until the time came when she had to go into residential care for her own safety and wellbeing. I had no contact with her when her family saw her through the assessment stages and returning from my first visit several months later after she entered a home I felt a despair akin to bereavement. This poem conveys how I felt.

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I am sorry to hear that you no longer write Ann. You have a talent that it is a shame not to use as your poems show that you have a way of using words to inspire and comfort. I feel now that...

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She Doesn't Know Me

Alan N. Prentice © more by Alan N. Prentice

Published by Family Friend Poems October 14, 2024 with permission of the Author.

In the crowded room she sits alone,
Lost inside her tangled thoughts,
Her eyes unfocused on the floor,
She doesn't know me any more.

This girl with whom I shared my life,
Who loved me as I love her still,
My dear companion, my best friend,
Stolen now to this sad end.

I cannot just desert her now,
Though every visit causes pain,
To see her weeping, sitting there,
Confused, and lost, and in despair.

Just one of many gathered there,
Cared for, safe, but lost to life,
To sit alone in lined up chairs,
Lost to all of those who care.

I wish that I could take her home,
To comfort her and ease her mind,
Shut out this cruel life, close the door,
But she doesn't know me any more.

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ABOUT THE POET:

I started writing when I retired and attended a creative writing course.
I have completed 3 novels, ( unpublished ), and 2 non fiction. ( also unpublished ).
I left school aged 15 in 1955 with no qualifications.
I had a varied career including working as a papermaker, an HGV driver, and a soldier.
I am a widower, have 3 sons and 4...

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!

What brilliant news - both about your help in the home and the fact that you are writing again. My poetry writing has definitely come to an end since my husband died. Very best wishes, Ann.

I am sorry to hear that you no longer write Ann. You have a talent that it is a shame not to use as your poems show that you have a way of using words to inspire and comfort. I feel now that I have broken out of the feelings of sadness that had taken over my writing efforts. This is due to having to find fresh works to take to my reading sessions and reading to Dementure patients is akin to reading to children in a way, and looking for inspiration from life and comedy has opened up a whole new field for me. It takes an effort but one that has lifted my spirits. Very best wishes. Alan.

Oh how well I recognise the emotion behind this poem. I wrote my poem She Tried to Fit In under similar circumstances. Very best wishes, Ann.

Thank you so much for your comments. The lady in the poem, Barbara, has now been in residential care for 8 months and has settled in quite well. Since her medication has been balanced she knows me again which is wonderful. Visiting her on a weekly basis has resulted in me volunteering to help in the home by reading to the residents as part of the activities team. We meet bi-weekly and I have a group of about 8 ladies, including Barbara who look forward to my visits to read poetry and short stories to them. It is wonderful to see the pleasure that this brings them and the bonus is that I really enjoy doing this. To see the laughter and memories that selected poems brings the ladies is a joy. Dementia results in sufferers living in the past and poems from childhood evoke such happiness. It has resulted in me writing again, a pleasure that I lost when I lost my wife. This has opened a new door to happiness for me.

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