She And Me

• by Alma Jasmine Nagisa Sibrian-Carlos
• 4 years ago

I'm 12 and I hate the way people see me. They think I am a freak because I'm so nice, friendly, touchy-feely, and laugh all the time, but nobody, not even my parents, know me on the inside. I hate me, myself, and I.

• by Redlynn
• 10 years ago

When my friend was going through a real bad case of depression and started self-harming, in front of me. I had to wear a mask. Pretend I'm okay with what she does, that I understand. I've gone through my fair share of depression and suicidal thoughts. I just think of my family and friends. Even when I sat in the shower and stared at the scissors. Anyway, I helped her get out of her depression by demanding she writes her feelings in the form of poems, which she's really good at. Now she's happy and scar free. Which is great because she's a really beautiful girl.

• by Micaelee, South Africa
• 10 years ago

Hi I am currently 14 and this poem says all I want to say, my personality is emo but I don't get to dress like one. My dad is constantly hounding me about it and I'm on constant supervision at school because I got caught while cutting and I haven't slept properly in 6 years the pressure is starting to get to me and I've cried out for help many times but no one cares as long as I pull their asses out of the fucking fire. I am so frustrated and just want to end it if anyone can give me advice or friendship it would be great. Am I normal in this world or are we all just living in a world on fire?

• by Clara Eve
• 10 years ago

I have the exact same problem. You just described my life in eight lines!
When I'm in my own house, I am a stressed person with depression and body image problems. I'm introverted and not friendly.
But as soon as I leave my house, I become a calm, happy person that never let's her friends know that she thinks she's fat. She's outgoing and friendly. My family knows what a horrible person I am, but my teachers, piano instructor, relatives, and the kids who go to school with me have no idea. I liked the poem, both the message and the rhythm.

• by Anthony, Glasgow
• 11 years ago

I'm 30 and a emo, this poem says how I feel, it does get emotionally tiring to keep up the mask to hide feelings that you don't want to show, but the mask is all I have as people don't understand and too readily judge how I feel.

• by Pam
• 11 years ago

I'm 15 I have gone through a lot and started cutting when I was 11. It has progressed a lot and I wish I could stop but I can't. Someone help.

• by Chloe, Plentywood Montana
• 11 years ago

I can really relate to your poem. But I'm still hiding behind my mask. I feel if I left my mask fall everyone will see the real me and hate me. My mom seams to find the faults in me and I want to be a good daughter so I put up this mask but it is hurting me more each day but if I let the mask fall will I really feel better.

• by John Cruz, Fl
• 11 years ago

Ok, I am 14 I live in Florida but I am nice in my own evil way I used to cut but I stop but soon I will go back to it. It's just that I'm bisexual I don't know if I like a girl or a guy so when I'm angry I sometimes cut a lot but now most of my bros from school are gone I'm going to the 8th grade soon so I hope I see some one I know. I was in a emo gang but got out. What we did I will not say but I used to be suicidal and now I feel pure evil inside. I'm not scared of my death. I like when people are dying but I really like blood so I mean its so weird looking I know I am insane or worst. The pain it's nothing to me but it goes away if some out there feels evil to then I wish he/she were together with me too:)

• by Georgia Houseman, Queensland Aussie
• 11 years ago

Hey, I'm 13 and I am one of those kids that are invisible at school. No one understands my life, they think I'm crazy and mental. I've been emo since I was 8. I wanted to get rid of the pain in my head and heart so I cut my arms and legs. I just hope there is someone out there that understands...

• by Lexii
• 11 years ago

This poem gets to me because it is my life each and every day. I'm sorry for those of you who feel as this writer and I feel. No one should ever know this feeling. It really messes with your head. But, it does get better. I've seen it happen, and it will get better for all of us.

• by Nykkey, VA
• 12 years ago

hay .......... your poem says all I feel , I hide my real feelings too. I am 17 I am depressed. I am bullied to know end by people who don't even bother to get to know the real me. I have been cutting since I was 10. I am emo. I have attempted suicide 2 times in the last year. I am bi and Jonathan Leon I care, I wish I had some one to care about me. I'd like to get to know you . Bye

• by Tyler Helms, Cullman
• 12 years ago

I'm a marker I take a coin to my wrist and the pain seems to leave. My friends think that I am crazy maybe I am? I have scars on my wrists, arms, and legs but the pain that I feel inside is greater than the ones that made the scars. I feel alone in the world that grows cold of envy no one seems to care or understand so why not just put a knife in my hand? I have to cut if not my mind will blow!! With anger sadness or depression so what will I do in this world of hurting and pain no one understands my pain that I feel. I'm really alone?????

• by Tyler, Indaina
• 12 years ago

I have a barrier around me constantly it is a fake me keeping the real me suppressed. I can't break it down no matter how hard I try. I am its prisoner and I can't break out alone.

• by Kiana Baker
• 12 years ago

I love this so much! I'm a cutter and my mask never comes off. No one know the real me and no one ever will until it's too late...

• by Antonia, Misouri
• 12 years ago

Please, keep writing!!! I love your poems, because I feel the same way. The only things that keep me alive anymore are writing, and honestly thinking of the paranormal. I always have to wear a mask at school, because none of my friends are really close to me. I don't really have anything in common with them, other than a few enemies. I've learned since a very young age that you can't rely/trust anyone in this world other than yourself.

• by Sid
• 12 years ago

Hey. I'm 14. I used to cut and burn myself but then I quit. But now...life is a living hell. My friends hate me. They always have....My boyfriend left me for a popular girl....I get treated like trash...My parents think I'm crazy and weird...They think its a phase and I'll get over it...But I've been emo since I was 9. They don't get me no one does...I wish someone could help. If you want to hear more tell me and I'll continue.

• by Stephannie Mossiah
• 12 years ago

I'm a cutter. I feel bad about cutting but it feels soo good!
it makes me forget about all my problems.
The adrenaline helps me through another day of my F*cked up life.
I heal pretty quickly, although I keep cutting deeply.
As long as I let out my messed up emotions, through blood.
I feel like death will have patience and wait a little while more for me.

• by Phoenix, Not From Arizona
• 12 years ago

I am a different person around each person I know. I broke down crying once in front of my mom and told her about all of the different people I had to be, and how much it wears me out every day. She literally told me that I was some psychotic lunatic for doing this. I've moved out since then. She treats me like I'm dirt, calls me stupid, and then when I go to stay with my grandparents, she calls us like 20 times a day saying "Phoenix, I miss you! When are you coming home?" and I don't want to go home. I can't keep staying here either. None of my friends are close enough to know any of this, and there isn't a single person in the world I can trust with all this. I've thought about running away. Where would I go? The only place I feel safe is at my school, or when I'm asleep. And even when I'm at school, I have episodes of depression, and I have to isolate myself from my friends so they won't see. They ask me what's wrong, but I can't tell them, so I just have to say 'nothing' a whole lot, and they keep asking and asking, but I don't want them to know, and I feel like I'm going to explode, and snap on them like I used to when I lived across the state. Back when violence and screaming at people was my answer. And when I'm asleep, I'm haunted by dreams of my old school, and all the people there who made fun of me, and would beat me up, and I just can't go on anymore! I've barely eaten anything in the past week, and I'm afraid to tell anyone because I don't want to go back into therapy. I don't want to go back onto the antidepressants. I just want to have my best friend from my old-old-old school back, and I want us to be able to cry on each other like we used to. And I know I have it a whole lot better than a lot of people, and I thank God every day that I don't cut myself, but I still feel so bad, and I feel bad about feeling bad because of the fact that everyone in my family was a cutter at some point, and there's a girl in my nationhood who is, and I feel like I don't deserve to feel sad and alone.

• by Taylor, Tennesse
• 13 years ago

I feel all of you on this. I just turned 13 and I feel so alone. I have over 39 cuts on my wrist from cutting. It kills me to find out the person I'm in love with is starting to cut themselves because I taught her how to. I take the blain for everything in my family and live in my older sisters shadows everyday. It kills me to realize that we are nothing alike even though I completely hate her. She wasn't there for me when her stepdad raped me repeatedly and therefore neither did the court because she wouldn't testify against him with me. I know he raped her too cuz I heard the screams and cries of her yelling for him to stop and get off of her. But she doesn't care. I am on depression medicine because of my past and it kills me to see everyone in my family get torn up over my stupid mistakes. I know it's not good but it seems like the only thing that cares for me is my razorblades.

• by Kira
• 13 years ago

I feel the same I guess I'm not all alone it pains me a lot how my life is. I can't bear it. My family doesn't know the real me but my mask is cracking they will never know until the day comes.

• by Kendra, IN
• 13 years ago

Hi I'm 18 I love all the poems I have seen today I felt like I was alone for so long my mom passed away when I turned 16 and my dad was always in and out of my life I would always lay in the dark thinking of ways too end my life. At the time I thought I had no one that no one would know I was even gone but I do have some one and she has been my hero for 3 years now love you!

• by Bridget, Ohio
• 13 years ago

I love this poem, it applies to me in every way! If you ask any one person who think they know me they will say that I'm a hyper, upbeat, sweet, caring, amazing person. If you ask me or my family or my real friends I/they will say that I'm always upset and depressed and that I care for others because I feel like no one cares for me.

• by Jessica
• 13 years ago

I look at you and your tears as they fall.
I look at you when your face falls and your eyes close.
I look at you with your pale face, your dark eyes that I fell into.
I look at your beauty
I look at your strength
I look at your wisdom
I look at your troubles, and your pain.
I look at you, my other half, And I see the Question 'Why me?'

• by Sherrel Stringfield
• 13 years ago

Emily Rose, I know that feeling. I'm 14 too, and when I try to talk to somebody about me problems, they always tell me, it's a habit or teenage stage, or I'm some kind of animal, or will just try to persuade me to get over it...It's heartbreaking to never talk to anyone who understands your pain. I don't even feel like I should be alive anymore. I told the kids who bully me at school, if they want to beat me up or kill me, go ahead. I won't stop them. I said that I'd rather die, than see their faces again and I'd rather be in Hell with Satan. Now they leave me alone.....etc,the point is, protect your heart and hang in there until the problem can be solved.

• by Bryan Silfee, Pittston PA
• 13 years ago

This is exactly how I feel all the time. I'm always putting on the happy face for people to see. I joke round and laugh and have a good time but its really not what I want or feel inside. All it ever does is make me more and more depressed that I have to hide my true feelings from people.

• by Kara Mcgaw
• 13 years ago

your poem relates to me sooo much
Jonathan Leon I feel for you too. you are not by yourself I hate it when people judge me for my choices in life

• by Alex, Virginia
• 13 years ago

Jonathan Leon, I can't help but feel for you. :( You're not by yourself. I some times feel as if I am; but truth is, I'm not. There are other people out there who can relate to you. I'd love to help if you'd like... I've helped all of my other friends with their cutting problem, I'm sure I could help anyone else who is interested. (FYI, I'm 16, and I've been cutting since I was in 7th grade. I rarely do anymore, but the desire to is always there.)

• by Jo Wrench
• 13 years ago

Jonathan Leon--
I'd like to hear about what you're going through.
Maybe this is something you can fix
I cut too, and I hate it when people judge me because of it.
Reply. :/

• by Jonathan Leon
• 13 years ago

not sure if it this is in my place to say but here goes...hello everyone yes I'm emo as well and I just wanna say that my life has been hell well if you wanna hear it please let me know...and I'm a guy...single...look short story is I feel left out and I'm beginning to think my "friends" are starting to hate me...just thought I let you know...that is if you care...and yes I still cut and have been ever since I was 12...good bye

• by Gwen, Texas
• 13 years ago

This is the exact way I am feeling, and now that the guy I like found a girlfriend (who might I add is one of my best friends ;() I've felt even worse for not taking a chance and asking him out last year when he did like me. Your poem let me know that I'm not the only one, and that others are going through the same thing.

• by Sydney, Memphis TN
• 13 years ago

I really loved your poem. I felt I could really relate to it. For years I felt I had been living in someone's shadow. I still feel that way but we all have things to work out. Your poem really rocks!!!!!!!

• by Emily Rose
• 13 years ago

Depression is in my blood. my mom and my 3 older sisters have suffered from depression. when I turned thirteen, I started feeling sad and angry all the time. I'm 14 now and I still haven't told anybody, except my bestfriend. when I told her I cut myself, she flipped. That's when I realized that I couldn't tell anybody. I pretend to be a person I'm not until I'm safe in my bed where I am by myself. Your poem tells basically what I HAVE to do. thank you.

• by Tiffany, Greenville
• 14 years ago

I am A 17 year old girl who has lived a lonely life. My dad always at work and my mom never wanting me. I sit in my room mostly in the dark and cry and when I remember every lie my mother has told me it makes me feel like I'm not wanted. After I turned 13 I lived in 6 foster homes. At one point I just became so depressed and I started to love the feel of pain because it made me alive...

• by Bree, Australia
• 14 years ago

I am exactly the same, I write these poem , this is how I act, thank you for letting me know, I'm not alone with that. I hate pretending for people, but that is what I have to do.

• by Brooke Alexander, Colorado
• 14 years ago

I also have the same problem. I always hide who I really am. This year my grades have plummeted because I have not been turning in my work. All I did was be on the computer writing my own poems and avoiding people. Your poem really pulled, on what I hope to be, my heart strings. Thank you for sharing your emotion.

• by Kendall
• 14 years ago

Your poem really touched me.... I have the same problem of hiding my feelings and writing my own poems and reading others really helps... So thank you and keep writing!