Dad

• by Irene Jones
• 5 years ago

Very descriptive, so heartfelt that it stirred emotions in me that I thought were laid to rest. Seems though that anyone who has felt the same raw emotions as Miss Smith will always be haunted by the dad who never loved them. Wanting answers, trying to understand why he couldn't love you. This hurt and rejection leaves you vulnerable and damaged. My dad left before I was born. I was one of 5: 2 brothers, 2 sisters. My mum was the best though, strong and determined, yet lonely and alone and I saw her tears when no one else did. He would visit us all now and again. He would ignore me as though I wasn't there, and he played us off against each other. He would favor one of us but ignore the others, and he knew what he was doing. Now even though he is an old man, he choose his one child and favored her over us all. My older sister and he are as close as any usual father and daughter. I will never forget what he has done to us all. We will never forget our hurt and pain.

• by Maine Coon
• 6 years ago

This poem touches me in so many ways. Today is my late father's birthday. He recently passed away before Christmas 2017. It may seem strange, but I still yearn for my father's love and acceptance, which I never received. My parents split up when I was 18 months old. He remarried and embraced his wife's daughter as his own. He was always there for her and bragged about her. He thought the world of her while disregarding me, his biological daughter. I don't begrudge my father's love for her. I only wanted and wished he loved me, too. He never answered my letters or phone calls. His lifelong rejection of me is still very painful and profound. He also rejected my son, his grandson, which has hurt him deeply. Part of his rejection of my son and me is due to his wife. She wore the pants in their relationship, and he went along with whatever she said or did, which included abandoning his first family. She convinced him to stop sending my son and me cards and money for birthdays and holidays. I have always loved him and still do.

• by Riman
• 7 years ago

My father died when I was 12 and he died suffering from liver cancer. Before he died, he promised me he will put me in a football academy school and I live without him just like a boy with no house .

• by Modise Mabote
• 7 years ago

I abandoned my daughter when she was 4. Now she is 20. There was no day that passed that I never thought of her, but I never tried to contact her because I didn't want to talk to her mum as that would cause me trouble with my new love who is now my wife. I got carried away in my new relationship, etc. To cut the long story short, as she grew up, the pain of missing her multiplied. I searched social media for some time but couldn't find her. I used to cry when thinking about her. How is she doing? Does she have everything she needs? Does she miss me? Does her stepfather treat her well, etc.?

I finally found her with a funny name. We started communicating, and she doesn't know that she is talking to her father because the Facebook page I am using is not mine. I was afraid of rejection. Even now I don't know how to tell her. I cry every day because of my selfish acts. It is really painful what abandoned children go through mentally. She asked me, "Why are you so nice to me?"

• by Amy, Indianapolis
• 10 years ago

My father was killed by a drunk driver on my 3rd birthday. I am told he was a great person and loved me very much. But, I don't remember. I had a few stepdads. They saw my existence as a burden and a potential drain to their pocketbooks. I am 33. I have had bad relationships. I always sought approval from guys. I always went out of my way to please them and show them I was good enough. Sometimes it is really hard and I just want to scream to the top of my lungs that I hurt. So that maybe someone will notice. I think I hate men now. I don't think I am capable of trusting one.

• by Aprilia, Mmotong
• 10 years ago

I'm a teenage mother now, my father left me when I was 7 years old and I am 18 years, I grow up living with my stepfather who never cared about me and when I got pregnant when I was 17 my mother kicked me out of the house :-(

• by Nicole
• 10 years ago

My father abandoned me when I was 13, I am now 17. My parents divorced when I was 5. He was physically abusive towards me and my mom. He was also a drunk. I had court ordered visitation from 5 to 13. During that time he hurt me emotionally, never paying me any attention, and physically, hitting me with bibles and belts. Even through all that I still loved him and I miss him everyday. He remarried twice and had a son four years ago. I held my baby brother a few times before I had to say goodbye to him. I also have six step siblings who I am not allowed to see. I wish my father loved me but I know he never will.

• by California
• 10 years ago

My father walked out of mine and my mother's lives when I was two years old. There are no words to describe the hurt I have felt my entire life due to that decision. I'm 62 now and throughout my life, every time I've listened to people speaking lovingly about their fathers, it's been like a knife to my heart. I never got married because not only did I not know what to look for in a man of character, I felt that if my own father didn't love me, no man would.

My father had a very unique name, and about a year ago, when doing a people finder search for him online, the search showed that he was deceased. He would have been about 91 when he died. Amazing that he lived all those years and never tried to contact me.

So, today is another father's day. My friends on Facebook are posting pics of their fathers when they were young, but I have no picture to share, no memories. All I feel when I think of my father is abandonment and pain. I've cried a million tears for him.

• by Ruby Washington, GA
• 10 years ago

I really do appreciate you writing this poems because my father left when I was 7 years old and I will be 25 years old this year and my father didn't even say goodbye or that he loved me!!!!! COL

• by Alyssa, Gulfport
• 10 years ago

I can relate to this so much. I'm a 15 year old girl and my dad left when I was four. He remarried and now has a little boy. I want him to love me so much it hurts. I try and do everything I can to make him proud. I make good grades I get awards I even play the sports he likes, but it never seems to be good enough. Sometimes I think he would like me better if I was a boy. I call him countless times a day but he hardly ever answers. I would do anything for him to just notice me.

• by Marriah, New Jersey
• 10 years ago

I'm my dad's oldest child out of three and when I read this it was like I wrote it. Both my mom and dad have always openly admitted to me since I was 12 that they didn't love me or care what I did. This was hard for me because I watched them openly love both my younger brother and sister. They never came to school plays or cared if I got hurt. They forgot all my birthdays, sometimes it was the next month and they would say oh by the way happy belated b-day. I think the fact that I also didn't have any living grandparents to fall back on made it worse, so I learned to live with the fact that nothing I did was going to change how they felt and I started to live for myself. I still have a few issues of course like I never let people too close but I'm just grateful that even though they treated me like that I still love both my brother and sister unconditionally.

• by Jessica, Ontario
• 10 years ago

That was very well written. I can definitely relate to your pain and anger. My father left me at 2 weeks old. I found him at 18. He flew me to his home a week later, it was the greatest day of my life. Unfortunately the joy did not last. I soon found out all he wanted was a 24/7 babysitter for his 3 other spoiled children. He ignored me as a daughter and treated me as an employee. I came home and he hasn't contacted me since. Although, he's constantly on Facebook chat but chooses to pretend I'm not there. I'm now 23.

Remember you're not alone!

• by Amberlee, Fl
• 10 years ago

My dad was around. He was the best dad ever until last year. He developed an addiction to heroin. My mom struggled with an addiction to heroin as well as meth and he used it as an excuse to do it himself. My mom is doing better now and my dad says he's trying, but I haven't seen much of a change. I know he cares about me, but I'm tired of him favoring drugs over me.

• by Sieda, Florida
• 11 years ago

My mom died when I was 9 and I didn't meet my dad till I was 22 so my grandmother raised me. when I did meet my dad at 22 he tried being in my life for a little while but nowadays I try calling no one answers I left messages I get no return phone calls or nothing so I stopped calling. It's been a long time since I talked to my dad but not because of me but because of him he has other children that he helped raise and who have been in his life all their life but I feel like an outsider as if I did something wrong and I feel a void in my life like I'm not wanted cause he has this other life and kids to worry about so this is why I can relate to this poem. It hurt bad but what can you do

• by Mena, Seattle
• 11 years ago

My mom has always been there for me, even when she criticizes me and says things that are hurtful, I cannot deny that she has given up a lot of her own life to take care of my sister and I. Until I was 11, when my parents separated, I was a Daddy's girl. I wanted to go everywhere with him, and he would let me. The last thing he told me before he left was that it was only for a little while. It has been almost 12 years since then, and in the last decade he has made no serious attempts to be my father again, has remarried and has two sons. I can't describe how much it hurts to go from being Daddy's #1 to being nothing at all. The little girl inside me is still waiting for my Dad to come back, there are still dreams I keep alive of him being there for my wedding, even though my high school and college graduations have passed with him totally unaware. I am starting to let go because these dreams are only hurting me.

• by Marlyn, DC
• 11 years ago

I am 38 years old reading this poem made me cry because that's the same way I felt for my father but God gave me a grandad that was awesome and looked after me like his own child. I felt that emptiness when all the children at school on fathers day they had dads besides them and they knew my grandad not my father. Now I have four beautiful children and I see them with their father and I thank God everyday for their father because he is here with us sharing every moment of their lives. I have made clear that if we ever be apart any reason don't ever break the bond he has with our children.

• by Veronika, Nevada
• 12 years ago

I am now 13, my dad left my mom and I when I was 3 years old. He told me that he would be back and he never did come back. He never pays child-support and right now my mom and I are hanging pretty low. When I read this poem I broke down into tears because I feel the same way. I cried even more when I read the part about the other kids because his wife is pregnant right now. It hurts a lot but I suppose that there is a light at the end of every tunnel. I'm just waiting till it comes.

• by Alex, Miami
• 12 years ago

At 5, my father was there but divorced so only part time and I remember it hurt when I was a kid sometimes. Now as an adult we stay in touch and I see a lonely sadness in him sometimes. I think I understand it now that I to am divorced and can't raise my son fulltime next to his mother. It's never easy being a part-time dad or having a failed relationship. It seems like it's all too often the statues quo these days.

• by Lorrie, Pa
• 12 years ago

I can feel for you. Age 53 and still waiting. My dad had another daughter. I told him I didn't care. I'm his first. I told him to tell her to take a number 5 because after all that's where she fell in line. She was number 5 and believe me not looked upon by the first 4. Not at all. My daddy accepted someone else's son before his own. No he never looked at us. You're a good person whether you realize it or not because everything and everywhere you got was on your own. Pat yourself on the back and put on a smile because he ain't one to look to because he don't care. He's afraid of growing old alone but you were afraid growing up alone so just turn yourself forward and don't put yourself into a way that you think he owes you because all you'll be doing is living and giving to him.

• by Billie, Ashland Va
• 12 years ago

Thank you for sharing this poem! I'm 37 and have struggled for years about not having my father and the pain it has caused me. No matter how hard I tried he never seemed to care. I have 5 kids of my own and they wanted a relationship with their grandfather but unfortunately having grandkids has not changed him. He disappoints them as he did me for most of my life. I can tell you that I have grown stronger because of him walking out. Funny but I do thank him for doing that. You will cry and hurt from it but don't it get the best of you. Remember he's the one missing out on a great person :-)

• by Carson, USA
• 12 years ago

I know this so well. My mom and dad never got married and he was never around I'm 13 now and he just started talking to me. But he remarried 4 years and I didn't know until my grandma told me. He's been there for someone else's kid more than his own. Now I have a half brother too.

• by Angela, Salt Lake City
• 12 years ago

My daughter's father abandoned us before she was born for a home wrecker who knew he was married and about to have a baby but didn't care, he sees her hardly at all, he visits her secretly because if the woman finds out then she starts problems with me or threatens him (so he forces me to never say he's around at all). My daughter knows who her father is and loves him so much, it hurts her every time he walks out the door because he stays away for months and months at a time, till recently he married the other woman and has kids with her so he gave up on my daughter which she knows even though she is only 7 years old. Now she is not dumb and she knows everything that is going on, and she seen his Facebook page where it shows him with his other kids but doesn't have any photos at all of her, and she asked me to send him some photos of her on Facebook so to hopefully see that he put up her photos there and I did to only find out he blocked me to prevent getting photos of her and made her cry

• by Ryan, USA
• 12 years ago

I'm a 15 year girl. My dad lives with us but works in a different state and is only home on weekends. He never said he loved me or hugs me it hurts so bad. He is never there for any of my sports or events. 6 months ago I tried to commit suicide, he does care about his baby girl. He is drunk every night, I just wish he cared. This is a beautiful poem I cried reading this, and anyone who knows me knows I don't cry.

• by Camille
• 12 years ago

Wow!! reading this made me reflect on my childhood without my father. As a child you feel like something is missing and it's really important to you and for you, but you can't put into words. I'm 38 now and was 5 yrs old when my parents divorced. They both immediately got remarried and had other children, I was lost in the shuffle. My father had more children and never acknowledged half of us. I always felt like I was never protected, like I was vulnerable to everything because he was never there. I was never good enough. To be back into his life now and watch and listen to how he loves and adores his step-daughter is heart-breaking because I would never get his affection or attention as his daughter. I always heard that fathers validate their children. I've been trying to be validated through so many relationships because I never received it from my father. Hopefully one day, I'll be able to move pass this and be ok, I'm still waiting.

• by Lisa
• 12 years ago

Thank you for posting this.
My father never loved me.
I am 12 years old, and he always chose my sister over me.
I guess it is because I am adopted, but I wish I still had my daddy's love.

• by Christy, Nebraska
• 13 years ago

I loved this poem it reminded me so much of my childhood, and how I feel about my father. He was never there for me, he never said he loved me, he never hugged me, he just never cared.
It's hard not having a father, when he remarried he took on the role of father to the other woman's children. It just hurts.
Thank you for putting words to what I've always felt.

• by Jen
• 13 years ago

I was 5 when my dad left and he remarried right after the divorce and had 3 other children with his second wife. I am 25 and I still feel like an outsider in my dad's life. My mom has always been there for me but all little girls want to be daddy's girl and I feel like it will never happen.

• by Angie, New York
• 14 years ago

I can completely relate to this. For my entire life, my father has been a workaholic who favored my brother and little sister over my older sister and me. I'm 23 now and it still hurts that he plays favorites.

Thank you, Ms. Smith, for sharing this.

• by Mizscorpio
• 15 years ago

I feel you. I am 15 going on 16 and feel that way. I ask the same question, and expect for the same answers but never receive them. When I read this poem it made me show emotion cause I was looking for something that expressed what I feel, and I found it. Thank you for writing this.