Divorce Poem

Letter To The Other Woman

This poem is dedicated to all the millions of women out there who, like me, were left by their husbands for another woman. Keep in mind that we will ALWAYS be stronger than that man because we still have our dignity and spirit!

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He cheated again after got caught cheating with a close family member years ago. He has cheated and I've been oblivious. I stay because our lifestyle is comfortable and because I was married...

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Honey, You Can Have Him!

Published by Family Friend Poems June 2010 with permission of the Author.

He tells you all his secrets,
he tells you all his lies....
He calls you on the phone,
he has you hypnotized....

He's a married man with
a family and a wife...
He HAD a happy marriage
until you came into his life.

You listened to him when he needed
you the most...
You should have known better
than to let him get that close!

You didn't have to sleep with him
to ruin our happy lives...
You just gave him advice
and made him realize...

He left me and our marriage
because of things you said to each other.
You gave him the courage
to have feelings for another.

A REAL woman doesn't covet another
woman's man...
She tells him to stand up
and do all that he can!

Why would you want him
when he left me for you?
You'd take the chance
that he'd do that to you, too?

We had our share of problems,
but you made him see
that love takes commitment,
and he walked away from me.

So now you get the man
who's in another woman's heart.
You get the man who left her
when you should have stayed apart.

Don't you know that difference between
what's right and what's wrong?
You should have stayed away
and not returned his calls.

Shame on you
because you did know better!
I talked to you about this on the phone
and now write you this letter.

Sure, we had our problems
until you came into his life,
but that's when he stopped caring
enough to want me as his wife.

But you should've known better
than to encourage his attention--
just a little fact that
I felt I should mention.

Honey, after the past few months
of what I have been through,
I have decided that you can have
him until he tires of you too.

And don't think he won't 'cause when the
going gets tough he'll just run,
place blame at you,
and go on with another unsuspecting one.

Then you can face a bitter divorce
and anger and tears
of the man he'll become
who will always switch gears...

Making promises out of guilt
and lies told to placate,
he'll do what he wants
until you decide to vacate.

So have fun while it lasts
and enjoy the ride
'cause your relationship with
HIM will surely die.

So no matter what you do
or if you play to win,
I gotta laugh right now,
'cause honey, you can have him!

Stories 42
Shares 582
Favorited 32
Votes 1052
Rating 4.44

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Has this poem touched you? Share your story!

by Michelle Marshall
5 years ago

My now ex-husband dropped a bomb on me back the end of October. He wanted a divorce and was in love with the woman who took care of his son while I worked, and he wanted to marry her. He claims we didn't talk. All I ever heard him talk about was how he wanted to have sex with a random woman to "put spice back into our love lives." Of COURSE I'm not going to want to talk about that! Anytime I would ask him how his day was, how he was feeling, etc., I would just hear, "Honey grab me something to drink and I'll leave you alone." Requests for him to go to a doctor were brushed off as me nagging him. He had planned on leaving me five miles outside of town in the home we shared, no driver's license, no car, and no way to pay the bills on what I was making. If it hadn't been for his new woman, I would've literally been homeless for over a month. My divorce was finalized on Valentine's Day (IRONY!!) and since October, I've dropped roughly 30 lb and two pants sizes. No more stress, good bye weight!

by Gainesville_VA_HeCheatedAgain
7 years ago

He cheated again after got caught cheating with a close family member years ago. He has cheated and I've been oblivious. I stay because our lifestyle is comfortable and because I was married with one boy to a previous husband. This is my second marriage and his second marriage. He has two girls from a previous marriage. He married me because he needed a baby sitter and a maid. I am a baby sitter so he an have his career. I have no higher education. He has higher education and works as a manager with a military background. I kept taking him back and turned a blind eyes because of the benefits and he is a white man. I'm old and not attractive and my chance of having a better partner out there who will want me is very unlikely, so I stay. I know in my heart he will cheat again and will lie again into some unsuspecting women's pants. He is not an honorable man with lack of integrity for sure, although we are both church goers and believe in Jesus. We stay because of our long history together and material comfort.

by Ramona
5 years ago

You shouldn't stay in a relationship that does not bring you happiness, regardless of your age or your looks or how many kids you have or if you have a degree. There is someone out there for you. Don't settle!! Know your worth!! I hope things are better for you! :)

by Fran
7 years ago

Sad story, but don't blame on other women. First of all, if man cheats on you it's his choice. It's his choice to betray you. Some women don't even know that man has a girlfriend or is married. If not this particular woman, it would be another one. Maybe he cheated before but you don't know. I had a man who cheated on me. Women didn't know about me. He told everybody he was single. I wish you happiness.

by Joy
7 years ago

I just wanted to believe that he would never do it again. He did and every time he left, it was without warning. I never want to feel that feeling of wondering when or if he'll leave when I walk out the door to go to work.

by CP
8 years ago

I love this poem! Thank you for it! My ex thought is was ok to APPEAR to be a nice, decent, CHRISTIAN man. But it was all lies and smokescreens. He led a double life, pathologically lying, stealing from others, including chasing after single, widowed, taken, and desperate women. He had the whole church congregation fooled. Of course all us women are CRAZY is what he would say. We imagine things. Ya right, he had other cell phones, multiple e-mail accounts, and his traveling out of state for concerts with the choir was all a joke. He even lied to the church pastor and was also seeing two different women from church and one woman from work. A real piece of work. Then he would play the poor innocent victim that grew up in an abusive home and dysfunctional lifestyle. Haven't we all had some form of dysfunction in our lives? But you don't see all of us lying constantly or using others for ill gain. Bottom line is he will not change and I'm glad to be done with it! Thanks again!

by Rose Kramer
7 years ago

I understand. My so called husband is the same. My prayers are with you!

by Omar, Dubai
9 years ago

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devastated when Frank left me. It was like all my world vanishing into sorrow and pain. But your kind words when I first emailed you gave me

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were the only one to give me that impression of being so true and caring. More than your words, it s the fantastic work you accomplished for me

that I will keep in mind. He brought my lover back and he made all my wishes come true. He s now loyal, pays attention to me, he offers me

flowers every Sunday, and we often go out at the cinema or at the restaurant. I will be forever thankful for turning my life from hell to

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by Christine Bordeaux , Chattanooga
9 years ago

Why is this all directed at "the other woman?" I have been cheated on and never got angry at the woman just at the man that did the cheating. He is the one that is supposed to be loyal, not her. He is the one that is supposed to love you, not her. It's easy to be angry at the woman who "took your man" but if he was so easily distracted it eventually would have been someone. I have had friends be lead into relationships with married men because of sob stories about their loveless marriages and mean wives. They aren't home wreaking sluts. Just another woman getting lied to.
Let's not attack the woman who "stole" your husband but the husband that left you.

by Laina S.
7 years ago

Thank you for your reply, I share your opinion, Christine. It is not the woman who broke an engagement with you but him. It sometimes takes years for a spouse to accept that his marriage is not what he wanted. This is not a bad person for that. It takes courage to accept this. Rather than being angry, you should be grateful for the beautiful years and beautiful moments spent together. A man is not your possession and should be free to leave if he no longer finds his happiness in the union. Wish him more happiness in his new union and you will be able to start a good life on your side rather than become bitter. Be grateful and you will be beautiful for another person who will appreciate you at your true worth.

by Agree With Comment
8 years ago

I was wondering exactly the same thing.... And my husband of 10 years left me for his affair partner and married her.

if you are dependent on a third party to keep your cheating husband honest you and your husband have a marriage problem!! It seems as though you believe you had a happy marriage until she came along. Guess what honey ...you did not have a happy marriage.

You need to get over blaming her .... She is easy to attack because you didn't expect anything from her but you expected everything from your husband.

The other woman is not to blame for the failure of your marriage you and your spouse were not on the same page bottom line.

People are not property and they cannot be stolen . He went to someone else of his own free will and it does not matter which of them did the pursuing. The poem is directed at the wrong person... It needs to be facing you and your husband and deciding if you want each other and then make your plans based on your mutual answer.

by Jessica L. Jacobs Formally Schickel
8 years ago

I am the author of this poem. My last name has since changed due to the divorce. You are somewhat correct by your assessment of this poem. Yes, my anger should have been directed towards him, and believe me, it was... however, poetry is such a personal way to share one's emotional process. For me, this was my process. I wrote a poem like this for my ex-husband as well. It just did not get published. As for the "other woman" and why I wrote this poem about her-- she was well aware of the fact he was married. She was his co-worker and was also married herself to someone else. They both cheated on their spouses.

This poem was my way of working through my anger. And going back and reading other comments submitted, I see that many women have related to it. I'm not perfect, and neither is this poem. Simply put, these words are what I felt at the time. It's poetry.

by Elaine, USA
10 years ago

My abusive husband of 38 years left me because he needed his "space." His "space" was a new condo with select furnishings, etc. His "space" included trips with another woman he had been seeing for a few years behind my back. This was not his first rodeo.
This, though he is a deacon in our church and is there whenever the doors open. The church I joined trying to raise our children. All adulterers will be judged by God. That is in the word. I was a Godly wife who was devastated by his and her deceit. He is a weakling and will pay for it. I will survive because God has me covered. I can't concern myself about them, but I know God is just and will take care of them and me. I have asked for a truly Godly man that I am attracted to. My husband was abusive, both physically and emotionally. God's got it. Thank you.

by Aj, India
10 years ago

I am going through the same and know how it feels. My life shattered when my husband of 3 years told me that we are not compatible and we should separate. We lived together for some time after that but mostly fighting. He picked up fights with me and here we have a culture of joint family. I confessed my worries to my sister in laws and mother in law and on my face they said all crap that they love me and will never accept any other girl in their family and told me to go and visit my parents and in the meantime they will talk to my husband. I came to my parents house. 2 days went by no one called so I kept calling and they reassured me that they are trying to talk with my husband and I should have patience. I did and then after 3 months my father in law said they are not bothered and whatever my husband wants will happen. Actually they all conspired against me coz all wanted me out of the house and are supporting my husband and his mistress. I feel so deceived...

by Terri, Middlesbrough Uk
11 years ago

Came across this today. I wish I had seen it earlier as it ironically lifts you up. 3 years ago on Christmas eve I asked my husband what was the matter? To be told that he didn't love me and was leaving me for another woman. We had what I thought was a happy marriage of 38 years. We had the ups and downs of any normal marriage. What I couldn't understand was ok we didn't make love every day/week but the previous week he had instigated love making with me and volunteered how much he loved me. I watched my 28 year old sons crying on Christmas day as he had no answers for them or me. He in effect dropped the bomb then "closed down"
Here I am 3 years later. We have in that time had 2 weddings and 3 births of grandchildren. HE VISITS THEM
He is living in her new house "paying her lodge money" according to what is written on the divorce papers. Previous to that he spent 2 years living in rented accommodation and costing over £22K while she lived in a 5 bedroom house she previously shared with her husband. Oh he didn't move in with her because she didn't want to start a relationship with him in a house previously shared with her ex husband???? Didn't mind doing the deed with him there did she??
Oh and did I mention her husband cheated on her twice with her best friend so she knew exactly how I felt.
In the times that his path has crossed mine he who apparently "Is ecstatic with his life" has aged considerably and never has a smile on his face.

I've just come out the other side of this traumatic experience. this is the first time I've written this online. So this poem it just hits the spot.

Thank you so much.

by Sue. England
11 years ago

My story is very similar, we had our problems which I thought we had overcome. But 5 years on he cheated with a friend of mine (who I also work with) I had to move jobs, have 3 devastated children and he still lives at home. Problem is I love him he doesn't love me in any shape or form. I am blamed for the break up of his affair, although I think he is seeing someone else. He's always going out, doesn't tell me where he's going. This has been going on for 19 months now and I am making no headway. I am rebuffed at every turn. He talks of divorce, I've even had petition papers served on him, but we are still here. Don't get me wrong I would jump at the chance to have him back, its just he doesn't want me!!

by Ya, USA
11 years ago

What an awesome poem and how true it is! I went through a rather terrible time when my (now) ex-husband cheated on me and ended up getting the girl pregnant. She knew we were married and had a child together but she said she didn't care because she knew she could make him happy and he wasn't in love with me anymore, so, I let him go. Now fast forward to 4 years later, I am happily remarried to the most amazing man on the planet and she is crying to me that he keeps cheating on her.

by Joan, Seattle WA
11 years ago

This poem was obviously written by a very bitter and angry woman. My husband was previously married for 25 years. Yes, he immediately divorced her to marry me just a short time after we met. Every day he tells me how wonderful he feels being married to me and how deeply he loves me. We have had an incredible life together for 8 years and his adult children really like me too. The ex-wife? She is still filled with piss and vinegar and refuses to move forward, very few people want anything to do with her anymore. The main point is that very often divorced men are often happier with a new spouse, many times it was the first wife that was the problem all along !!!

by Agree With Comment
8 years ago

My mother was not an easy woman to live with and I would have divorced her myself. My father wound up marrying his affair partner.

34 years later I refer to her as my stepmother and I love her tremendously. I was 14 years old when my parents divorced and my father remarried shortly thereafter. She is the best thing that ever came into my life as a child and she's been a total role model for me as an adult.

My Ex husband left me for his affair partner and married her. And while the pain of infidelity was great I also have come to understand that sometimes we marry people for the wrong reasons.... Especially when we marry in our 20s and early 30s.

We can wish bad karma in hopes that it will make us feel better Lord knows I did my fair share. But when the winds died down you will begin to see that your marriage was not as real as you thought it was because it takes two people to be married not one person to be married and one person looking in another direction at someone else.

by Terri, UK
9 years ago

You make me sick, I hope you experience the pain, heartache and hell of a woman left by her husband. My husband and his mistress caused me to want to kill myself, you disgust me. I hope you get a double helping of karma just like them.

by Denise
9 years ago

I have just read the story from a year ago and you sound like a vile, twisted, arrogant and nasty individual and the man you married sounds like a spiteful twat! I believe in Karma and like my ex-husband and his mistress you will both receive a big full bucket!

by Lina
9 years ago

Just saw this post you made a year ago and wonder if you still feel the same way about how happy you are to a man you took from another woman (a married man) It might take a while but what starts wrong will ALWAYS end wrong. If you were in a relationship with Jesus Christ you would understand and would have never had done something like this I will pray for his ex wife to trust in God and she will be redeemed for all she lost and I pray that you will come to know Christ and ask forgiveness for the wrongs you've done.

by Nikita
11 years ago

Hello. I have been the other woman and all you wives out there...one request...I am also a woman. I also had a failed marriage before I met a husband. Why are you blaming me? What did I do so wrong when a husband came to me and told me he loved me. What did I do so wrong when I tried my best not to but (damn it) fell in love with him? What did I do so wrong when you never even came to know I existed as the other woman, watching you guys hold hands, kiss, try and look happy.....what did I do so wrong that your husband left you because he wanted to? Not because of me? Why why blame me for everything? I am also a woman just like you....I am also as vulnerable and madly in love with him. Maybe just like you?

by Rosa Escarrega
11 years ago

I agree with Carla. You can't judge right off the bat because every situation is different and there are ALWAYS two sides to every story. Sometimes the "devoted" wives cheat or lie and then want to cry when they get left for another woman! My husband was legally married but separated when we started dating because his former wife had cheated on him while he was deployed in Iraq, I got called every name in the book for talking to him while he was going through his divorce. But the fact that she cheated on him was always ignored. We have now been married for almost 3 years and have 2 children.

by Kd, Durban
12 years ago

This poem makes me very worried it's exactly what is happening to me and my boyfriend. He was married when I "Stole" him and we got along just fine until he left his wife for me. But now he is cheating with different women. His ex wife warned me after he found out... But I was still blinded by love. I'm still with him because I'm trying to prove to his ex wife that I can do better. Me and ex wife are chatting and I'm pretending things are fine in my relationship.

by Sister Lydia
12 years ago

This is the whole of the matter: a man who has no respect for God and for the covenant he made before Him is a dangerous demon. Do not grieve for him. Be glad he abandoned you before he gave you some dreadful disease.

What goes around comes to astound. There are a lot of men who do this and wind up vagrants. The 'other' women get rid of them at the drop of the hat. They never stick around to put up with the nonsense the real wives endured. Good riddance to bad rubbish!

As for the marital vultures, those skunks have their reward in Hell. Be strong, lady. Be strong!

by Carla, Australia
12 years ago

Well I stole my partner ( if you want to call it that ) but I have never been happier his ex and I speak and get along fine sometimes life works out for the better.
Each story is different so don't judge on the cover.

by Sheila, Virginia
12 years ago

Thank you so much for having the courage to share your feelings. Your poem has really helped me in this nightmare. My husband of 26 years had a mid-life crisis and decided he didn't want to be married anymore. He started an affair with this woman, and eventually moved in with her. Unfortunately, I lost both my dignity and pride as I struggled with my grief and tried to salvage our marriage. I learned the hard way that it takes two to make a marriage, no matter how hard I tried. What I cannot understand is how this "nice lady" could knowingly take up with a married man and thus help destroy a marriage. She had previously lost her husband to cancer, and apparently it was a tragedy at the time. So how could she do this to someone else's wife?

by Trisha, Oklahoma
12 years ago

I love this! It hit home. My husband of 2 years was cheating on me and the girl he was cheating on me with knew about me and our son, but she still chose to mess with him. I got fed up with it and besides that he was abusive in every way he could be. Now I'm going through a divorce. I told her if he did it to his wife what makes her think he wouldn't do it too some sideline hoe.

by Isharon, New Jersey
12 years ago

This poem hits on every thing that I'm feeling. I have been married for 28 years with two beautiful girls 14 and 18 and my husband and I have been going through a lot of problems with our business and he choose to look up a high school girlfriend and had an affair with her. She never married or had any children he moved out for 3 months then came back but the women still continues to contact him. I guess she thinks this is her last chance with a man and choose to continue. Apparently she or he are not thinking about my children on me but only of themselves.

by Laina S.
7 years ago

She is only a women in love like you. This is not an easy situation for either of you.

by Rach, Kentucky
12 years ago

I just found out one month ago my husband was cheating on me. We have been together for 17 yrs married for 2. We have 2 children. At first he said it was nothing and over but I checked the phone log and he wouldn't stop texting her. I moved out and when I did he moved in with her. I read on his phone where he says he loves her and more. He sees me and says he loves me and he says I am so beautiful and tries to touch me but I will not let him. I am so lost right now b/c he is all I know since I was 17. Last night I found out that instead of taking our kids to cub scouts he took them to her house to eat supper....ouch and so wrong! I love him so much but I know it has to be over! I was willing at first to forgive but more bad things keep happening that I find it harder and harder to forgive. What to do!

by Jay, Tx
12 years ago

I was with my husband for 5 years, we have 4 kids together. He left me for his co-worker. At the time I was completely shattered. It was Poems like this one that made me stronger. I'll never forget what my sister told me today was his day tomorrow and tomorrow will be mine...ohh, And believe me it was after he saw that I was over him..long story short He came running back..my point is to the women who are going through this it's not the end. Always remember Today is their day Tomorrow will be yours!!

by Dana
8 years ago

Thanks, I needed to read this today. I have been with the same man since I was 17 years old. For 16 years I have put up with everything. We have 3 kids. One is 6 months old and, he just left. He says he wasn't cheating, but he's with another girl. Today is his day; tomorrow will be mine :). Thank you!

by Melissa, Ca
12 years ago

Wow!! I wish I would've seen this poem when I found out my now ex husband cheated and left me for another bimbo!!! I could really relate to everything it said and it's sooooo true!!! I really loved him and he broke my heart.....the pain was so unbearable for me to bear, but I think my son endured more of it because his dad left us and has no contact with him whatsoever....Time heals all wounds which is a day by day experience but I got over it. People that do bad things like this eventually get what they've got coming to them and it's called KARMA!!

by Samantha, Cayman Islands
12 years ago

Tears felt my eyes as I read this poem for I know of some of my friends and family members going through this very problem and I'm gonna share it with them.

by Jillian, AZ
13 years ago

This hits home, I went thru an devastating separation, after a 15 yr relationship & 2 children, 3 other women and a child, I realized that I was in an abuse and hopeless relationship, she (the other woman) didn't realize his past and the torment that I had to endure and now is faced with the same BS I went through. As of now I am engaged to a wonderful man, my children have never been happier and he and his new girlfriend are as miserable as can be, might I mention that he does communicate once in a while that the grass was not greener on the other side and he misses his family! Oh well, the grass is much greener for me and my children! Sorry!

by Angie, VA
13 years ago

I love this poem. It fits right into my problem. My husband of 3 years together for 10, has been cheating on me for almost a year. Why because she was a listening ear to when I complained. If she was in my shoes, she would've too !!! But love hurts and make you do crazy things. I just pray to God to get me the strength to get through this !

by Priscilla, Florida
13 years ago

My husband and I had some issues and left me before his deployment to Iraq, leaving me and our 4 month old daughter at the time. While in Iraq he met someone else, when he returned he wanted to make things between us but this other woman was always getting in the way until she became pregnant with their son. We started the divorce process and he stopped the process and realized it wasn't what he wanted, I chose to give him that second chance. We moved in together with our daughter who is now 3, but unfortunately I am facing a divorce a second time because this other woman didn't know how to respect my marriage after telling her many times I did not plan on leaving my husband. I blame them both. This poem has inspired me and made me a little more stronger.

by Jessica Jacobs-Jenkins
13 years ago

This is a poem I wrote back in 2008. I am glad and thank everyone who likes it and votes for it. I also want to say thanks for the women who have said it helped them too.

I just wanted to update everyone who has read this: I am now re-married and life does go on. Ironically, the woman whom I wrote this poem about is now living with him and my son stays there part time. Lovely isn't it? : )

by Raquel, Texas
14 years ago

My husband of 10 yrs fell into the arms of another woman, forgot all about our 2 yr old son...this poem hit home & after reading it...I was a little more stronger :) thanks

by Shanna, Owenton KY
14 years ago

My high school sweetheart and husband of 5 years left me when I was 5 months prego for my best friend... this poem is exact and lifted my spirits! Thanks.