Poems by Sami Chester

I know you may not think so,
But I'm trying really hard.
I don't do it on purpose.
I did not pick this card.

I'm trying my very best
To get this hurtle jumped,
But no one else is there
To help me out of this slump.

I don't know what you want from me.
Give me a hint or clue.
Please give me a sign.
I don't know what to do.

If you only knew
How much I struggle in this war,
Maybe you would be there
To pick me up off the floor.

It's time to stop pretending,
Time to open up your eyes,
To give me a hand
Instead of looks and sighs.

It's not that I don't love you,
And it's not that I don't care.
The fact is I need help too;
I need somebody there.

You think that I don't miss you
And you think that I don't care.
I'm tired of all this.
Time to open up and share.

All these problems started
Many many months ago
When you started all the lies
And kept hidden things that I should know.

From there on, it just kept adding
To a debt you couldn't pay.
That's what lead us to
Where we are at today.

There are times I think of you
And really want to cry.
And every time I see you
I can only wonder why.

You hurt me in so many ways.
I hope it doesn't show,
But if you ask if I regret
Leaving you, then no.

Even when I tried
To give you another chance
I realized with you here.
My life has no balance.

The last few months with you
Was hell on earth and more.
Way too many tears than laughs,
My eyes and heart too sore.

That emotional rollercoaster ride
That went up and down again
Has been evacuated
Until the very end.

Thanks for all the memories,
But you can keep them all
'Cause I'm living in the present
And I'll keep standing tall.

You try to understand
But I don't want you to
I don't think you can comprehend
The pain that I go through.

I never get to sleep
Because I cry all night
The doctors don't know what it is
Or what's wrong with my sight.

The pain's almost unbearable
Like a thousand stabbing knives
And when my skin gets wet
My body's covered in hives.

I wish that I could show you
How it hurts to breathe or move
But I know that it's not possible
So this I cannot prove.

The touch of skin or fabric
I want to scream out loud
But I know I won't do so
Cause the sound drowns in the crowd.

What's that you say
I can't hear you
Speak up please
It's my hearing too.

My muscles freeze
My joints lock
I am scared
I cannot walk.

I lay in bed
Do nothing all day
My mom brings my food up
On a tray.

I chew my food
My mouth needs to soak
I sip my water
I start to choke.

I'm scared to think
What happens next
Cause the situation
Is too complex.

I think about you all the time.
You're always in my head.
I reread every text you send
And remember what you said.

I'm always here for you,
Every hour of the day.
I'll never let you down
Or hurt you in any way.

I love you more than anything.
You're like the air I breathe,
And when I look around,
I know you're all I need.

My sunshine on a cloudy day.
That's one thing that you are,
And even on the darkest nights,
You are my brightest star.