Affliction

Can you possibly fathom how it feels
To live without the unparalleled thing
That you really, truly, genuinely want,
That makes your heart throb and sing?

I know you presumptively haven't,
Or you'd beyond doubt be just like me;
Closemouthed from the inside out,
Yearning, thriving, wanting just to see

That one person I really, truly, undoubtedly want,
The only one to end my endless, blissless drought.
Passing over to me a illimitable sliver of happiness,
And then, on spur of moment, I'm free of all doubt.

At that very occasion, I think it's all gratifying
When I'm floating buoyantly on thin air-
Then I'm plummeting groundward
When I realize they're no longer there.

Do you realize how that feels?
To be a carapace, abandoned, and hollow,
Knowing nothing but to brace yourself
For the inevitable pain that soon follows.

Living without the sole thing on this great Earth
Heaven or Hell, that makes you whole and completes you
Is not a desirable life, believe me when I say,
The emptiness is not something you wish to live through.

The forsaken, deceiving semblance slowly furnishes me
With outlandish animosity, hunger, and a strong desire
When my only prize in life, what I live for, is gone,
To burn everyone and everything with resentment as my fire.

Great Earth, Sky above, divine Heaven, and the depths of Hell
Bellow for me at once, each in attempt to gain me with lure.
I lament, I scream, I fall to my knees, and ruefully for my suffering, 
For this terrible affliction, there is no cure.