I have bad Anxiety (Medically diagnosed, don't say it isn't real) And I feel this, the constant pressure of living up to what you're "Supposed to be"
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I can feel your pain and I can relate. If you are like me, you wonder where you went wrong raising your daughters. I never or I hope I never made my mom feel the way I'm feeling now. It hurts to even remember my girls growing up. I'm not a part of their lives now and I miss them so much. I don't want to look back and remember them as children either because the pain is too great!
They don't come visit. The only way I see them is if I go there.
So you are not alone my friend. There are more of us out there who are lonely like you.
It was the same way with my mom but my dad took me out of the situation which I'm thankful for. I was on the verge of taking my life but when my dad got me he stopped me. I love being alone because that means no one will hurt me.
I'm so sorry for your loss! My dad died also through the hands of neglect and just plain ignoring my dad. He went into the hospital for an urinary track infection , he could walk, talk and eat without any assistance, 1 week later his legs were contracted to his chest, he couldn't talk he was in a comatose state. I demanded answers what happened to my dad I got nothing. He died 2 days after coming home. They said cause of death was Sinality! My dad was not senile.
Oh my goodness, Patricia, you have been busy commenting on my poems lately. So kind and thoughtful - much appreciated. Your good friend, Ann.
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Patricia, You are indeed a friend - a very good friend indeed. Thank you for always being there for me. Love and very best wishes, Ann
Thank you, John. I am struggling on - quite hard as we were together for well over 50 years. However, kind understanding comments like yours do help.
Patricia, I love it when you comment on my poems. You always say such lovely things, which means a great deal as you write so beautifully yourself.
I totally relate to the part where you say "abuse is rape, not touching" because touching is still abuse (in my opinion) It still messes with your life. I don't go a single day without thinking of my abuser and what happened because it was traumatizing. Even for people who only have it happen once- I'd still call that abuse.
This poem holds a special place in my heart. It captures the raw struggle of someone I love deeply, offering a quiet strength and hope that words alone often fail to express. It's a lifeline - one I truly believe could help him keep going. Thank you x
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