Rueth

Why did I decide to change the course of my life?
I was impatient and naive that I let people take advantage of me.
My life has turned up side down, and now it is crashing down.
I thought I could find love and hold it, blindly I went for it
And tried to hold on to someone I thought felt the same
But only caused myself heartache and pain.

I gave all that I had, my mind and body and soul.
For what, only to be told that I was not the one he wanted to hold?
That I was just someone he could control.
Said he was ashamed to be seen with me.
You don't know what that has done to me.
How stupid am I that I cry and cry?
Cry out why? Why?

Then I am reminded of the choices I had made.
Those choices have changed my life completely.
I have done this to myself.
No one is to blame.
I thought if I ignored the pain,
The pain would go away and things would change.

But I was wrong; things have changed.
I do not feel the same.
For what was once love has turned to hate.
And now I must make my escape.