Julie N. Hawbaker

When the struggles of Life and Loss break you,
And leave you sad and feeling blue,
Shattered into a million pieces,
When all Hope is gone and ceases,
Find the strength to gather the broken parts,
Sweep them up and rearrange them in your Heart,
Then offer them up to the Potter King,
From brokenness only He can create a beautiful thing,
Your Precious Pieces He will hold dear,
Sealing them with mortar made from your tears,
From trash into Treasure,
His Love for you is beyond measure,
Only He knows the pattern He has planned,
Entrust your broken pieces in His hands,
Life's Mosaic in the Master's Care,
Turns into the Finest Art beyond compare.

On the edge of tomorrow,
Between the death of night
And the birth of a new day,
Time stands still,
For just a moment
Held in God's infinite grace.

It is there,
On the edge of tomorrow
I see my beloved's face.

Forever 26
She will always be.

Passing days
Will never erase
Her radiant smile
From my memory,
Nor mend the hole in my heart,
Which her suicide tore apart.

On the edge of tomorrow,
Between the death of night
And the birth of a new day,
She lingers there,
My beloved daughter
For a while.
Her laughter and song carries on the wind
For miles and miles.
She dances with the dawning light.
A twirl, a spin, a twirl, a spin.
She is my beautiful whirlwind.
She scatters the sunshine into the day
And forces the sunbeams to take flight.
Coloring the skies is her task
To make this glorious morning last.
Filled with joy and at peace,
She merrily pirouettes away.
Spilling purples, peaches, and pinks,
She paints the horizon in a wink.
Chasing away the gray and darkness of the night
She has found release.
Pleasing her Heavenly Father is her goal.
This little ballerina will never grow old.
Only she truly knows
Why her spirit was dying to be free.
I am brokenhearted
That she chose to leave me.
My Love, My Beloved, My Sug, My Baby Girl
Has departed.
My love for her just grows and grows.
Together in eternity someday we will be.

On the edge of tomorrow,
Between the death of night
And the birth of a new day,
My heart is filled,
For she has found her resting place.
She is safe from the cruelty of this world
The harshness, the abuse, and the insults that were hurled
No longer touch her,
Wound her no longer.
She has become whole,
Complete,
And stronger.

Forever 26
She will always be.

On the edge of tomorrow,
Between the death of night
And the birth of a new day,
I will leave my sorrow.
Knowing rays of sunshine
Fill her soul with glee.
Watching her smile, laugh, sing, and dance
With the bright morning star
Before our God and Lord
Is heavenly.
Quickly approaches the day
And then the night.
Thanking God for the chance
To see her again.
It is such a blessed sight.
With God's help in time
My heart will mend.
Content on the hopes and promises that tomorrow holds
Am I.
Praying my love she can feel
The warmth of her mother's embrace.
Assured our destinies are forever sealed.
The future I can now face.
Never having again to say goodbye.
Both our names are written in the Book of Life.
Knowing she is not far
I will wait for her.
My BrandiRose, My Firebrand, My Flaming Sword,
My Naami Dea.
On the edge of tomorrow.

"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."
{Ps. 34:18}


Written In Memory of my Beautiful and Deeply Beloved Daughter, BrandiRose, on her 34th Birthday, March 26th.
By Julie N. Partch Hawbaker

As the sun sets into the mountains,
In the western Colorado skies,

I search for you.

You are,
Somewhere,
Out there.

As the stars begin their celestial flight,
And Jupiter begins to rise in the cool October night,

I search for you.

You are,
Somewhere,
Out there.

And I am just but a lone earth bound shadow in the night.

Galaxies apart were you and I.

You left this world at 26 with no good-bye.

I will never understand,
Why you chose to die.

I search for you.

You are,
Somewhere,
Out there.

And I am just but a lone earth bound shadow in the night.

Wishing on every falling star,
And the meteor showers raining down,

I question.

Have you seen her?
Have you seen her?

And then my Love,
My Love,
You who were lost to me,
In this universe,
Are then found.

Time stands still.
And the earth stops spinning.

For just a moment,
We are two shadows,
Dancing in the night.

You, my beloved daughter,
And I.

I watch the moon beams flicker in your eyes.
They rise up and fill my heart with light.

Earth bound,
Radiant,
You strived to be.

As God and Venus watch over us,
I hold you close,
Kiss you,
Then set you free.

Burning big and bright,
Bursting forth,
My Comet,
My Daughter,
My Joy,
My Everlasting Delight.

And in the early morning light,
I am forever after changed.
I am no longer just but a lone earth bound shadow in the night.

My search for you is over.

I’m letting go,
And giving up this fight.
I’ve finally been able to say good-bye.

Like a Shadow,
Like a Comet,
A Spirit never really dies.

It only changes form,
And soon again will rise.

I am forever after changed.
Now knowing,
You will always be,
Somewhere,
Out there,
Always dancing with me.

And you my Love,
My Love,
You SHINE, SHINE, SHINE!

"What is lovely never dies, but passes into other loveliness, Star-Dust, or Sea-Foam, Flower, or Winged Air." Thomas Bailey Aldrich.

"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality."  John Lennon.